A peek into my mind....

Annddd... I'm Back!!!

2010-06-18T14:54:00.004+05:30

Heyyy! Man did i miss dis place!!

Its been wayyy tooo long hasnt it :D, but everything here is so much the same, is js clik n i can scribble n then i js click again n u can read!! cool han :P

But lotttsa changes with me han! as of now, u know wats hooked me up??? FB!!! :D i know i knoww, i joined the badwagon very very very late, but like they say it, better late than neva! i've been njoying gathering ( i wanted to say 'batoring' read it wid d hindi accent ;) )compliment bout my luvy duvy!! dats my son :) hez such a darling, n i luv it that everyone else thinks hez a darling too :D

andd i'm gona try to make it a practice to be here for a lil while everyday! js to sribble my time away... hmm nice thought ehh?

untill thennn...

Hei!! (dats Suomi, boletoooo Finnish!)

Kya din the yaar...

2009-03-11T14:24:00.003+05:30

It is often that we look at the past and imagine it to be better than it really was, our outlook at the present is worse than it really is, and that of the future is more miserable than it actually will be, and this is the reason, people find reasons to be happy.

Very simply said, i never realised that the past was perhaps so beautiful because i looked at it that, no comments on the present and future bit :) I wont deny that it is such a dominating fact that most of us look at our yesterday as better than our today :) , our school was better than our college, our college was better than our work place, our last job was better than our present job :) wierd coincident nai? n as we move on it will still be the same, we would again think of this time as better than that time we would be then living... and say .. what days... kya din the yaar.. :)

No psychological nonsense here, but pondering over why it is the way it is.. is :D something that can change the 'persperctive' perhaps..

Well, why am i pondering over this?? i happen to read something like that i rote in the first para, in a forwarded mail n i thot.. ahhhh so true! n it is almost everyday that i spend my evenings 'reminiscing' the past by sharing my so called 'old days' with my husband :) n he never misses trying to show me that the present is far more beautiful and this will again be 'reminisced' as 'old days' just like m doin it now :)

HAPPY 2009

2009-01-29T16:52:00.003+05:30

sheeeshhh.. i frgot to mentionnn

HAPPYY NEW YEAR!!!

i was js lukin thru my pehle ke posts.. i realised... 2005 se i've come a longggggg long long longggg longggggg wayyy.. n that one.. i mean do sau pandra was my first post of the new year n i dint even realise... :) so ithot i'd scribble a lil to let that thot out :)

i'l soon come back witha new post.. i think i have an idea :D

ciao!

Post no. 215

2009-01-29T13:55:00.003+05:30

Well, ok.. simple baat hai.. i know m lazy, and i very well know m bored, n i think m goin on to starting to feel.. home sick :( country sick.. aur pata nai kya kya sick..... they all used to tell me.. but i always thought it wudnt be that way for me... shuru me sab accha lagta hai.. baadme malum hota told my cousin who recently moved to the US with a craze like ...... ahh sab ka wahi hisaab rehta i guess....

its not a big deal waise.... its always like this, human aint happy with whats in hand, u always hope for better and then think of the supposedly better past and then you pause for a while and think, come on, this is so beautiful, and then u move on again..... its like question bhi khud hi, answer bhi khud hi fir reasoning bhi khud hi, aur to aur marks bhi khud hi.. wo bhi 10/10 ... yea rrite!

There are many things i missed logging, this was supposedly my.... umm what do u call it... equivalent of things to do list.......... Things i've done, and want to remember, and dont want to forget, and like to read of later and...... u do get my state of mind dont ya _:D

An idol mind is the devil's workshop, i heard that many many times, i quoted it many times too, lately i've been probably experiencing it... waise the last time i was told that statemnt in order to show whats goin on... i was realy mad! aj fir i was told that same thing... but aj laga.. may b sahi hai.. but i wish my devil were a lil creative and make me do the wackiest things eva, i dont wana be bad.. i always had and have agoody image :D although i dont strive for its maintanance, perhaps somehtings come naturally to u :D:D:D....

arre u know watt... i was in the papers here... yea the local daily... :D full page pe meri foto, with Santa :D just the two of us ;D but since he was too huge, m lukin tiny in the pic.

i've watched like 40 movies so far, irrespective of good or bad.. can u imagine that! i neva had the time, i dint know what was goin on in bollywood, i mean.. movie story acting wise, waise to i kept a close look at the music charts, since that was my only sahaara during my hardcore coding days at Wipro:D, but movie... i used to be laughed at by dost log if i'd mention movie.. it wud be soemthing they'd watchd monthssssss ago!

waise i still love the snow here.... we do make it a point to go play int he snow for quite sometime.. its always fun, it sjust that its terribly boring to get dressed to go out n play..

The timings r getting a lil normal i guess.. atleast it doesnt get dark at 3 anymore! i was in a gathering recently, ya managed to force myself to chek it out after denying some invitations.. n surprisingly had a good time :)... dont ask me why suprisingly.. i dont have d patience to relate the earlier experiance!

and yes i had a very luvly sweden trip within this period :D wo bhi.. Cruise meeeeeeeeee :D:D:D it was my first eva journey over the waterss, and i had a ball.. it was luvly... the very idea of sailing was awesome, n the cruise was no less than a mall.. waise i guess waisehi rehte .. got to see the all firangi nightlife sort.... hmm it was nice :) but ya again i missed my ppl usme :) n i cant forget the dinner we had :D it was very bad tomato soup.. n the other thing... i dont remmba its name but it had a very tiny toast pe 2-3 prawns and a shrimp which we left untouched :D and one more toast exactly like that but with tuna fish topping :D... i'll upload the pic once i get my dusra wala laptop jisme saare pics hain :)

well its been two long months which seemd to have ran really fast... ya absurd i know.. icall it long and gthen they also ran fast.. :) but thats how it is.... its like a peaceful storm, so who cares if its a storm as long as its peaceful :) ... i dont know why i said dat bit :D

my day is full of bhejafry.net, gmail, my kitchen and ofcourse i have my dear husband moving with me in all this :)

life has changed... n i luk back and smile... and i know i'll walk further and again look back and smile, may be i dont enjoy so much living it then, but when i look back, i miss it.. i love it.. i want it back... its like for every moment perhaps... not that m missing out on living the moment in missing the earlier one's.. its perhaps just that..,.. may b its meant to be that way... u always luv ur life coz its urs :)

well adios for now.. no promises pof comi ng back soon.. but yes ofcourse i'll try like i awalys do.. not that i dont have time... i just did mention wat m doing with all that i have :D

Maassalaama!

Santa n Me :D

2008-12-15T16:26:00.006+05:30

It wazzzz gr88888 !!!!! I had itnaaa itnaa itnaaaaaaaaaa funnn naa ki kya bolunn... i dint expect the evening would go that nice :D, i had n okie dokie day.. n was bored, n dint wanna go to the ummmm what do i call it now.... ... it was a fair may be... baby exhibition samjho :D well m callin it dat coz it was no where in comparison to apne hyderabad ki yearly exhi ( which m gona miss dis year :( ), khair, ya... so i wasnt really in the mood, but since we had planned that we would, we did go.. n it turned out very nice :D ... nai.. not the exhi.. wahan kuch nai tha... :D js candles n choclates n kuch kuch ki dusre cheezan jo meku kuch khaas nai lage... so we tuk a round..which ended in bout... ummm 15 mins may be.. n dat was it.. then... we knew that Santa Claus was supposed to come at 5.30 so i thot chalo v'll see him n go.... we waited for some mins.. n they we saw a bus full of kids n red clothes n a huge santa like thing that passed by... thodi der baad he entered.. n mannn was he biggggggggg, he was soo sooo soo huge, nice n tall, n very very gol gol, he wore hi spects on his nose jus like they show in cartoons :D n he was fair n most of his face was covered with his super duper long white sily silky beard :D.. kyaaa daadi thi yaa.. sachme... :D n i cudnt stop smilin.. i was js starin at him n smilin at him, he came in n walked ahead of gang of lil kids dressed in red n wearin red topis.. n u know wattt... as he walked he came rite in front of me n stopped to talk to ME!!! :D:D:D:D:D i was sooo overwhelmed, there were sooo many log wahan, but he stopped to talk to ME :D n i cudnt top bragging bout dat bit to my husband :D. He smiled n asked where r u from, when i said India, he bowed n held his hand togethe rn said Namaste :D n then asked where in india? n named a few cities, banglore delhi mumbai ? he asked, yea he missed hyderabad, n then i answered Hyderabad, to dat he replied with his ho ho ho kinda voice :D oh welcome!! all the way far from india :D.... sab log were staring at me while we shook hands n he spoke to me :D:D:D:D:D:D bohottt mazaa aayaa hahahahah.. it was funnnnn

herz wat he lukd like.. :D

all the way from Finland..

2008-12-07T19:57:00.005+05:30

Hei kaverit !!!

:D well thats finnish :D n i just said Hi Guyz ! Well i've like said a million times that life's so differently beautiful after shadi, n one of the many major differences as of now is my place of residence :)

Finland is a beautiful place, i am so much in awe with this place that most of the time i spend at home passes off admiring the christmas tree that i can see right out of my window :D. An awsomely pleasant weather surprise, i was always crazy bout making a snowman, n i'd always 'advice' my collegues who'd have their onsite trip ( which was always to Finland , my client was Ericsson, Helsinki dats in Finland, remmba!!!) magar koi banaate hi nai the, n i'd wonder, how silly of 'em, how cud one go to such a place n comeback binaa snowman banaye :D. what do u think i did then??? ... ye dekho :D

yea, n guess what tme i did that :D it was 1 in the night :D n my sweet husband was gud enuf to accomapny me in that crazy moment :D although he too thot it was crazy to be out in dat temperature on the day 1 of my arrival :D but he gave in to my silly request :D n we had a ballllll n thats his muffler :)

To see the snowwas in itslef smthing to go crazy about... i dint surprise myself by not being crazy, i did behave crazy . i was all in there.. full snow me jumping n loting ( read dat in the hindi sense of the word, the T sounds like that in 'cat' not like that in umm 'Tasneem' :D ) to see those talll trees all laiden in snow, it was wowwww... those roads all empty for me to stand just in the middle with those conical kinda trees at their sides n beechme mein with my hands open wide ahhhhhh kaisa laga hoga :):) breathtakingly beautiful side of nature n just another way to acknowledge that He is the definitely the utmost Superior who has the knowledge of every little creature on this earht, n wow, He manages everything so well. one side of the worls is soo differnt n at d same time just the other side of the world is soo so so different :) the Creator of beauty and magic.. ahhhh.. accha thik hai abhi bas :D

pata hai... my journey was one of its kind :D, actually na... it was like d first time iw as travelling alone, so i was obviously freaking a the very thought, but i obviosuly posed as an absolutely advertent, brave girl who cud manage this adventurous trip, Oh come on, i was an educated, working engineer girl!!! ab apne paas kaisa hype rehta, malum na :D:D khair... i js kept tellin myslef, ofcourse i can go, big deal !! but man i was having a horrific time, typically deining what butterflies in the tummy means... i always that i cud feel that during exam time, but this time it was the ultimate description, nothing else cud describe me the meaning of that metaphoric sentense that i always kept thinking of.....

i started off... n boom, i had a bad time wid my luggage... it was bohot zyada n i had to remove stuff.. plus kya hua malum... ahh my luggaage bag tore!!! ya!! i had filled it up utna zyada, khair.. its like gharwaale do d paking n u know when its our ppl handling it goes like, jitna nikla nikalne do, baaqi ka waapis kardena... yeaa.. dat kind... khair.. fir i had to get it umm i dont know kya bolte usku.. kuch plastic covering karke diya wo fella.. n he tuk 400 rs. frm me!! chore! khair.. finally set n i came out for a final bybye.. n moved for d immigration.. i wasnt sure what all of it meant, i was js duin as i was bein told n as i cud read :D n i fianlly landed in the lobby near my flight gate... 3.30 ki flight thi.. morning!!!! magar apna hyd ka airport itna accha haina, they played luvly music... n i also had my ipod along.. to pata hi nai chala waqt.. i boarded my flight.. usme bhi pata hai kya hua! huh... silly dumb stupid me... the boarding pass had my seat number n i dinno which one was d seat number... i thot kuch aur hai seat number, th elady kept calling in batches os seat rows, i missd mine... she finally asked all the baki ke passengers to come along... dats when i joine d:D later i realised i was slukin at d rong thing :D

The fligh twqs comfortable... i cudnt sleep thik se waise... but it wasnt required... it was very long magar... 10 hrs se zyada kuch tha.. first 4 hours or so i was ok uske badse i got restless.. n then pata nai kab nind lag gai... the food was ok, the air hostesses wr so old malum hai, apne pas ich itne young young air hostesses rehte... by the way it was KLM Airways, they r french... i landed in Amsterdam, it was 8.30 in the morning i guess... it was cold, n i was well dressed to suit d weather, my husband ensured that for me! i walked out.. i dinno kya karna ai next, but i luvd dat airport, it wsa so nice n big n it ws gud to see sab firangs running around... i dint follow d crowd, i thot i'd get lost if iwud... so i dint... kept lukin at d beautifully decorated christmas trees har corner pe wahan..... i had a 4 hr transit there... pata hi nai chala where time flew... i saw my first snowfall there :) ... there were some armchair kind to relax, i wnt on n helped myself... i was sunny... i was rite in frnt of a huge window.. n cud see flights landing and taking off... so i was js njoying y music... n suddnly it went all blue n grey n no nmore sun n then i saw smtin white tiny dusty ting falling down n i wondered, such a beautiful place n luk at the way they are shoving off dust from d top floor, later i noticed it was snow :) n i laughed at self n then went near d window n kept gazing at it... it lasted for a few minutes, say one or two.. tat was it... n then my flight was reshceduled to a different gate n by d time i reached there it was time to fly again...... tat was another 2.5 hr journey... n i was hell restless this time.. u know wat.. d steward offered snacks n i missd to sopt mars n snicker inistray n picked a 'tuck' biscuit packet!! how dumb naa!! urrghh.. later i thot i'll request for one, n he did offer but this time his tray was empty, there were just those biscuits left... n i realsied.. dikhaawe pe na jaoo, apni akal lagao, dat biscuit packet had such n attractive wrapper, it actually made me miss a luk at my favorite choclates!! i had taken two lollipops from her tray then... he just smiled... they r still lying in my purse.. i dint have em, coz d flite landed in the next 20 mins... n i was out.. js knew that i must now collect my luggage, n iwas praying ki kuch amsterdam me nahi choota :D coz u know what i saw at d amsterdam airport as i was waiting for my helsinki flite!! i lookd past d window, n there was this luggage carrier, it drove fast, seeemd like it was to catch a flite, n in that while it dropped a suitcase rite on the road, n obvisouly d driver dint realise n he drove ahead.... many gaadiz came after dat, no one pikd dat laawaris bechara bag, n then finally n gud samaritan walked out of his truck n pikd it.. i thot he wud take it along... he jsut put on the footpath kinda thing there... n drove off.... wo bag more than one hour ke liye wahin pada tha... huh.... i kept wondering as i waited for my baggage in helsinki ki aisa to kuch nahi hua merebag ke sath... coz my bada wala bag taht had torn, wo to aagya tha, the other one was taking so much time,... oh yes that lawaris bag was finally pikd up n taken by someone, i dont know if it did reach d rite destination.. how wud it i wonder.. there were so many flites atking off in minutes wahan.. pata nahi kahan jana tha use aur kahan pahuncha..

well... ais akuch tha safar.. m aisi kuch chal rahi hai zindagi.. will keep this place happening now.. i've got alot more to pu tin.. next time.. may b n insight to Tampere ( dat the city ka naam )

untill then.. näkemiin (thats goodbye in Finnish :D)

----------------$!$--------------------

2008-09-30T23:57:00.003+05:30

i'm not sure if this has sunk in yet.... there are sooooooooo many sides to my thots n emotions (uhh umm errr... ?@#$!%^&) yea... kinda like dat :D:D

arreee yarooo.. shaadi ke rukhkhe bhii aagayeeeee !!!!!! $%^&!#*(!!!!! yea.. i js saw the cards... my shaadi ke cards... Tasneem Begum ke shadi ke cards? uhh ummm.. ok.. ok.. thik hai.. i like the card waise, bohotttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt accha hai Mashallah mashallah :D but well.. yea.. it still is like.... u know one side of me is like... ummm.. mmm .. shaadi... meri shadi ? hojari.... ohhhhhhhhh kkk.. !?!!!!?

no serious pondering here... its only !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! n ??????? n $$$$$$$$$ n ########## n @@@@@@@@@ n %%%%%%%%% n &&&&&&&& n ******** n everything else that one can not understand :D

loll.. ok.. i dont mind staking dat m behaving crazy.. hota hai :D

Massalaama!! :)

2008-09-01T16:54:00.002+05:30

They usually operate in OT's as of i knew, mine was better ;) gee now it sounds gud but its painful :( i was on the dental chair (yea dats wat they call it). After a week long of acute molar pain, i decided ( rather was forced by my dad) to go see the dentist. I thought it was my usual, well not jsut mine, anybody's usual toothache at this age, when they actually welcome that 'wisdom tooth', han ye aur baat my wisdom has nothing to do wid dat tooth perhaps ;) n i know all of u have different opinions ;) i wudnt wanna elaborate on ur opinions though, i can imagine them being categorized into to fiercely opposite ones :D:D:D.

neways.. jaana to tha, dad wouldnt listen, he actually started the senti stuff too, haan why will you listen to me now that you are getting married, you've grown up, you can take ur decisiions bla bla blaa.. n i wudnt take that ateast, but come on!!! i hate doctors i hate hospitals, n a dentist, come on! ek hi breed ke to hote hain sab!! i had no choice, i had to go... pain killers were no relief :( my food intake reduced, my mouth was hardly opening :( n wahi time pe yummy food was cooking up ghar me... ab soncho!! so i went finally! n like usual, i dint like dat dentist either! he suggested n x ray which i obliged to and from that he declared that i require a surgery! i went bizarre with the thought, he coudn be just crazy! he has to be much much more htan that to tell me that i require a surgery n extraction of all my wisdom teeth, meri akhkhal ka kya hoga yaroo ( han wo joke tha ;) ;) ) i dint lisn to him, spent another two days in acute pain with pain killers he prescribed me, baba woudlnt lisnt, he made me go to his dentist, n now i had no choice... he said i did require it :(:( n i had NO choice, i could live with it, but only at the cost of damaging my other molars very soon if not right now he said... he also assured that this was nothng new, 7 outta 10 had the same problem, n dont worry all of them need surgeries so they'll all get them done he said.. i felt better :D:D:D:D

I was appointed saturday, 2'o clock. I was scared :( everyone knows i hate docs n medicines, i can do any any anything to escape 'em, is mtimes also feel docs r one of those gud fr nothing jerks or they are jerks with too much knowledge who think no one can survive without them, all in all i dont like 'em, perhaps i i dint come across a down to earth, modest, dutiful, selfless, humanity serving doc yet n hence my opinion? errr... who cares?

My time was preponed, they asked me to be there at 12, i reached at 12.30 :D nai yarooo yahan b late bolke mat soncho! i cudnt help it this time... i had some reports to fetch from the diagnostic centre n i they wernt ready, i did give them a tough time though, n so did baba ( ab soncho their haalat ;) ;) ) all i said to them was i have a surgery in 15 mins n u still dont have my reports ready :D u shud have seen their faces, anyone would be scared of that word perhaps :D khair..

i stepped in a lil late, but as usual, the dentist was more late than i was, so i dint obviously regret, rather i was jusssst on time, so it was ok, i was called in, n my eyes fell on a tray with syringes with some liquid in it, two of which had normal straight needles n three of them had tilted, pooooooore ke pooooooooore he used in my mouth :(:( kitna dard hua pata haii :(:( he kept drilling n used screw drivers, pliers :( i wish i had a hammer to hit him......... accha nai tha magarr bohottttttttttttt kharab tha bohott bohot kharab, n i hate docs n dentists n hospitals n patients and pain :-X

m luv'in it

2008-08-16T21:02:00.002+05:30

Woooo hoooo... long longg longgggggg time nai... n the wierdestt thing is the change in timing of my last post n this one... not jsu time, my frame of mind, the place, everythinggg :)
i've been sooo soo soooooooooooo buzy malumm... being home is sooooooooooooooooo gud :) i dont know time kahan jaara... its almost past midnite when i hit d bed (yea yeaa!! i dont sleep at 9 anymore :D) n subah also i get up early :( baba dznt like us sleepin late... khairrr... my dayz startin at bout 7 or so.. n 12.. tak kuch chalta.. longgggggggggg naiii n poora din what i do.. dont ask yaaro... i dont know kahan jaara my day... not dat m shopping all day... bilkulllllllll nai.. infact today was d fisrt day baba log tuk me along fr shopping... ghar me home ka stuff kitchen kids funn shopping people cmin goin aise hiiiii chalre jaraa u knoww.. accha hai... its nice.. veryyyyyyy nicee :)
every one kept asking me why r u leaving why r u quitting.. do they want u to quit ( i dont know kyun sab ko aisa lagta when the girl quits ... esp in our community ) well jo b hai.. i was told u'll b bored u wont know how to spend these 10 12 hours dat ur spending at office.. blaa blaa blaaaa... magar filhal to i'm enjoying it to d core... i dont have to think for what m gonna do wid dat time at all... aisa guzar jaara na waqt ki bas... i js keep wondering.. ki hogya din.... days r runningg .. time is flying... life is at such a fast fast fastttt pace abhi... n luks like a thairaav ( ye hindi word hai.. theek se padne ki koshish kariye :D ummm its something in line with.. thairna i mean standing still etc.) is gona cm.. n hmmmmmmmm.. pata nai.. :)
n like usuall m ok to feel this confusion :)
thoda up hai thoda down hai thoda nice hai thoda gud thoda wierd hai thoda ajeeb hai thoda scary hai thoda soothing hai.. hmmmmmm bohot kuch hai yaro :)

chalo m offf.. massalaama..
i hope i cn hang around here more often.. its nice penning nonsense again :)

ohhhhhhhh myyy goddddddddd kal mera last day hai :D:D:D

2008-07-28T17:57:00.002+05:30

yeaaaaa m excited :D, m happy.. m very glad actually.. ki m leaving kal.... wo thoda bhot nostalgic nonsense hunga in sm corner of my heart, but may be it'll surface tomorrow :D, coz aaj to i'm happy.. wo bhi bohottttttttttttttt coz i finally made him change my date to 29 like it was earlier :)
i am sooooooooooooooooooo khushhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh :))))))))))))))))))))
long story hai, bad story hai, sad story hai, but in the end, since its my story, it can just NEVA NEVA NEVA go bad, n NEVA NEVA NEVA be the way i do not want things to be :):):):) coz He's always on my end :D :D:D:D:D
hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm n now i like it more.. u be gud, u g et gud, u be bad, u get bad.. now they understand :)

chalooooooooooo time upp...

Adiossssssssssssssssss ! :):):)

the bloody male ego!!

2008-07-22T12:06:00.004+05:30

This would perhaps come as a surprise to many, 'coz its no less than a fact that Wipro is supposedly one of the best places to work at. I wouldn;t deny that, i dont really want to actually, ;coz i;ve had a great time at this place except for some of the bitter experiances (which perhaps eveyr place does offer) and these last few days being my worst time spent inspite that i dont want to. People you are with really matters.... your environment is such a driving force, it can take you high at peeks or pull you down to ur lowest, and it is so human to be a part of such traps.
No one really likes it u know... where u;ve spent good time, u;d wanna part amicably, i had no different opinion, untill i realised i was being a victim of one of those sick male ego's. Nothing to do with anything at all, but just just just to feed and soothe dat damn ego a man can leap to irritatingly annoying extents and ofcourse at such times he so greatfully collects all these curses.

Baat kuch hai hi nai, its js that i supposedly dint listen to him, and i trusted him ! the mistake seemingly is definitely mine, absolute stupidity is what we girls exhibit in certain circumstances n perhaps dats d reason they sometimes are victimised to somehting as worthless and bloody ego of a chauvinistic male! I believed him when he said i can tke 5 leaves and that he would approve them even if i take them after my resignation. Although he did highlight to me that there is a policy that after resignation one must not avail leaves " But its fine, i can approve it, it will not be a problem" he had told me, n silly me believed him! A day before i left, he told me i can not take 5 days i must take only 3 and when i enquired why on the basis that my work was up to d mark and i had no work dependencies and we were very safe with relesae deadline, he just said i could not n there's work( which he did not elaborate even on question, and i was very very well aware that there was none coz i know enough of atleast this season's project release line!) I obviously did not oblige coz i had pallned a month before for the week, n had informed him also about it so there was no question of me listening to him when he changes his plan 1 day before! But i dint think it would carry on to this extent and take this shape....

He changed my release date now, n when i questioned him he said he did not do it (damn liar!!) n said dat it was automated, n when i asked if it was automated how cm i was not intimated, he just gave me another lie saying he was not aware. I reached my HR n hez not aware of who changed the date, n he got into it n got back to me saying your manager has done it !! n when i told him that my manager denied havign any information bout this, he said he cant do anything. I tried mailing both of them together, trying to maintain transparencey, n my damn manager shoots out allllll lies in the mails ( half truths rather) n when i requested for a face to face meeting with both of them in order to clear things coz there was lot more to it, my manager denied to oblige for the meeting!!! seee dat creep !! now wat do u call it all... he js wants me to stay coz i dint listen to him, or now he just wants to ensure that i leave as per his date and not what was earlier assigned!!!! sick man, sick ego!

but no! , i ain gona sit here n keep looking at how things hsape up, not to feed his damn ego atleast!!!, he'll get the worst ever review he neva must have imagined to get in his 11 years of employment!! n i'll ensure i leave on my earlier date! if it werent for my ettiquetes i;d screw everything here! atleast his life!

(: I'm an angel, n i know it :)

2008-07-17T10:29:00.001+05:30

Dont ask me Y i did this... i just wanted to.. :D:D

2008-07-14T12:06:00.010+05:30

And the countdown begins-- Day 12

2008-07-14T08:37:00.002+05:30

Yea, those hi din hai... n i have 'Things to do' wo bhi so many... n uparse i have a pissed off mind coz of my manager's attittude, i dont like it, but i he luvs playing politics i guess, he forced me to extend another week, i said i can not, he ended the talk with "Everything is in my hands" huh! i did finishe my project commitments, infact m being so gud that i didnt even deny giving the proposal for somehting i would'nt work on. It is surprising that they have the "software ethics" only till books, how could it be that i initiate a proposal, i do the analysis, i give th estimates n ( no second person involved han) i wonder on what basis they;d promise to stick to schedule when they dont know of what; gona be done??
He did'nt approve my engagement ke time ke leaves although he said he would, n he had also assured he'd take care n that i could go ahead, n now on the basis of those very days he says i got to stay bak... bad na? yea he is!! wo bhi very bad!, i aint gona stay, i said i cant commit, he replied, 'ya anyways everything is in my hands, i also can say the same thing rite tasneem!' ... khair bla, last ke din hain, wana spend them well.. n may be i will :)

yesterday baba manged to catch a glimpse of "Babul", han wo dumb super duper flop movie that was n absolute drag, n my bhabi was dying to see it when she was newly wed n hum sab gaye the dkehne!!, i thnk sony pe aari thi.. i was sitting with mum in the drawing... dad cant miss "Baghban" evaa, hez watched it more than ten times abtak, n he would mind another ten, n ten more n more n more of it... channels change karte karte, he saw hema malini suddenly, n then amitabh, n he had a glow on his face, it was baghban he thought... then i realised it was Babul, n luckily it was the last 10 minute thing... n it was melodramatic crap... n then the last few dialogues were kinda like... babul, beti, bidai, etc, etc ;) now my dadd :D:D:D:D:D i guess was almosttt bout to drop dat tear, n thankfully the movie finished :D:D, i lukd at mum wid n uncontrollable grin, mom was laughing too but she was more into trying to hush me up else i;d burst may b she thought...
it was funn... :)

SuKoOoOoOoNn

2008-07-09T16:38:00.002+05:30

They say it well u know, if you want to learn, you must from little kids, the innocence they offer is such a level above the intelligence of this so called materialistic societal nonsense, their idea of peace, joy, happiness, love, care is all so simple and so beautiful, n u know wat, i jus luv it the way they depict this stuff in cartoons :D, the naughtiness of bugs, the creepy mindset of tom, or the wacky ideas of jerry, the innocence of tweety, n goody goody thing of poo, the dumb atittude of tiger.. its all so simple, n easy, when they show all these emotions in so much color, i reall wonder how and why it gets messy when the same are emoted by humans :D

u see this pic oopar, wat color, wat contrast, wat peace nai :):) n the best thing is how it appeals to kids n how they undstand all those wierd characters emoting so well ... :) inspite dat they have no fingers on their hands (errr, although they are supposedly 4 legged animals :D:D), inspite that the huge characters hav tiny ears n the smaller ones have very big ears :D n that they are always h appy irrespective of anything, n even if they are galti se sad, the rest of the cartoon world is all set to cheer them up, n thats wat d whole episode is about.. :)... wierd na, cartoon makers usually pick such themes, perhaps witht hte idea to impart those kinda ethics to little growing minds n hearts, wudnt the world be a better place if we'd extend this to a higher level.. ummmm.. askin for too much 'eh ?

khaiirrrrr.. challllllllllta lite...
saw dat pic, n luvd to see d peace in it... :)

Chocolate barsaaat at T4/T/C115

2008-07-02T10:56:00.002+05:30

i went to fill my bottle of water n get mycup of coktail, wn i got bak, i saw Uma at his seat, i was back at d rite time :D, he lukd at me n gave a wide grin wid a Tasneeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeemmmm how r u, n i replied gr8, n he showed me dat pink box of choclates they r called 'Geisha' n he held it in front of me n said these r specially for u hahaha, is aid feelin even better, n held my hand out, then put my cofee cup down n held both my hands out :D:D:D n he put in soooooooooooo manyyy chocsss :D:D:D itne saare neeche b gir gaye...... they're yummmmmmmmmmmmmmm

kuch aur din..

2008-07-01T10:09:00.002+05:30

This is my last month at Wipro, i dont know where time just flied... its a wierd feeling magar.. not dat i wana put in thanku note to Wipro here ;) :P:P but u know.. reminiscing the entire period from September 1 2006 se lekar ab tak... man.. i;ve come a long way, n its surprising i came so long so quickly :) n life's taken such a huge leap in this very place...

I mean.. its unbelievable that i'm quitting my first job... was'nt i in college js sometime bak ( errr.. dont gimme those yea rite! n grow up! looks :P). It was such a typical first job first job craze, that desperation to clear the aptitude n moving on without my best friend clearing it (ya i was actually so sad that she dint get thru, n incase i do v'd actually have to part ways :D:D, silly ab sonche to.. but.. umm ok.. made sense .. more than sense then.. :) ) n then the tension to clear the technical interview after knowing dat no one in my slab were sent thru to the HR round, geee they sure were nail biting moments, n dat khalid sir's luk when i wz thru the technical.. u know it was like.. oh come on of course u;d b thru it luk.. but still it had that.. ummmm kya bolte.. u know.. ahh wateva.. Uno Vinny the Poo ke jaise lagte the meku :D:D:D just dat i found Vinny cute and him annoying. .. ehh.. neva mind..... umm i dont wanna traverse rewind karke abhi.. thoda time hai na.. so i'll do it in bits n pieces i gues... but ya spending the wholeeee of 2007 yahan pe was like... ummm accha bhi ok bhii not nice bhi (i'd use 'bad' but :D i dont like to use dat term wid anything related to me :D:D) khairrrrrr i did get to know there cud b bad ppl in this world too, bad boleto utne bure nahi, han kuch my manager jaise.. i know alllllll of u sympathise wid dat guy, i dotn like him magar, in this tenure of much much more than one year n just a lil less dan 2 years he wasnt able to impress me wid any jhalak of his managerial abilities, banda aisa rehna, dekhe to tabyath khhush, u shud feel like working with him .. nah.. i dint.. khair khair kairrrr, hez always been the masaala of my posts magar :D so i wont se zyada aur about him...

my fav line used to be 'the best thing bout coming to office is to walk back to d bus bay to return home' :) geee what a thought ;) ;) m gona miss this place i know, the people too, my coktail, my gaane sunte hue kaam karna kinda thing.. o ya this is one thing i luv bout my manager, he neva said a word inspite dat i;d have d volume full n ut d headfones down on d table instead of wearing 'em, n i'd sit rite beside his cube, n i'd torture him wid hindi music obviously :D

but u know... i;m suddenly getting this feeling dat everything is finishing so fast.. although i;m at d threshold of whole new beautiful life, i still feel, oh this came so soon, n so it;ll finish too.. eh..?

Hilko re hilko re $%#@&^$#%$

2008-06-13T17:39:00.003+05:30

I am so close to my second hundred that when i login i kinda feel a lil, well ok may b they call it a push.. but nah.. dat aint d sole .. (dont they call it motivation??) blaa.. but ya.. one thing i dont wana lose trak of.. is messing up.. or may b js cleaning up my mess.... m in the flow of stabilizing my lifestyle (already??? ehh rrite!) An elaboration perhaps is required on that, lest it gives the idea dat m walkin thru a messy life :D, no it really aint dat, its jus that m trying to get back to posting regularly ;);) and i dont see myself making a sincere effort to that, never the less, since its bein made (the effort yaroo!!) it doesnt matter zyada...
Penning down silly details of life (yes, they sure are silly, n they js seem all the more silly when u read 'em later :D) seemd like umm, ok a silly thing to me, i knew of so many who;d write "diaries" n ya i;ve grown up watching those children flicks n cartoon movies in which they start of "Dear Diary..." :) not surprised to know many (not kids) do it too, even now.. :) I dont know why, when'eva i;d try, i;d fail :D, a brand new diary i;d surely get for myself, and promise to write to it everyday.... but somehow, i neva would .. n the year would end, n i;d buy a new one, n i;d look at my old one n see dat i;d written less than 10 pages in it :D, and then sometime.. i dotn really remember when... i guess it was in my holidays of final year of engg? or may be the third.. i bumped into this blogging thing... i dont know how magar.. n tab se... was well kinda glued to it (??) m not really sure why m filling it all up this way :D:D:D:D:D:D but ummm.. welll... okk.. :D

LAst few days at work actually.. n i dont wana miss doing wha i used to do most willingly yahan pe ( come on, kaam to nai hosakta :D:D:D). I got my hands on this very nice collection of gaane from this colleague of mine ok, kal se woich sunrun... sab oldy gudies, not the very oldies.. oldies bole to, not the newies :D, Kamaal khan's suno to diwana dil .. sunke i was like..w ooooo hooooo.. after such a long longg longgggg timeee... n now its.. aawara bhanwre.. hmmmmm

Abbbbb bass bhai.. meku zara time lagta flow me aane.. dats all for aj :)
Adios!

5th June 2008

2008-06-10T14:40:00.003+05:30

Wooo hoooo hoooo, dats a long long longgggggggggggggggggggg time back dat i;ve been here yarooooo... howcm koi miss nai kare meku :D:D:D hehe okok litee

well but ya its been such a long time, which somehow dint seem zyada long to me coz so so so soooooooooo so soso soso sosooo sooooooooooo many many manyyyyyyy gud things happened :) infact kya se kya hogaya kahan se kahan chale gai my life :) and Alhumdulilah Alhumdulilah.. i cant thank Him any less for what and where i am abhi Alhumdulilah :)

ahhhh ummmmm ok.. jana hai yarooo cha... i know m scribblin after long wo bi.. itna sa :( but well... bottom line... hum kisike shareek-e-hayaat banne waale hain very soon inshAllah :)... geeee i like dat word :D

Actually i thot its been so long so i cn mess it up bohot here but.. ok okkkkkkkkk m cominggggg..

chalo bye!

To the Anonymous'z who visit my blog

2008-05-05T14:58:00.002+05:30

This post perhaps would seem silly, but it does have a reason for its existance, quite obviously.. i would;nt call this a dedication to all the anony'z who drop by my space, but ya i;d just like to say... its nice to know there are people out there who find it important to keep trak of my whereabouts, i also realise this might just be my khushfehmi, and may b one or two of you who drop by are genuine in maintaining ur anonymity...

Identity has always been a matter of concern to me, be it mine or someone else'z. I sure can filter out the genuine anony;z in this.. but y would anyone wish to hide who or what they are from someone they think of, or someone they care for, or someone they love or someone they hate for that matter?.. shouldn;t it be quite evident, that although presence does matter, it is also important to know who is present... aint it?

Surprisingly, all the anony comments i get r well pondered over thoughts over my posts... when u read, u think and u actually care to let me know what you think, can i please request all of you to also let me know who thinks what..? It really would be nice...

Thank you very much for reading me, but would also love to know who all of you are.. would just help me relate to your thought better, n m quite sure u'd want that too.. :)

hate hypocrisy!

2008-05-02T10:29:00.002+05:30

Fine if m here for a crib again.. perhaps its better to let go here befre i yell out elsewhere.. may be the second yell would be a lil sobered down version n so save me from the guilt of messing up with words (incase i do it!!)... why does the damn world have to be so bad? why do people keep two sides, why do they have to be good to you when they behind ur they can say what u;v never done!!! thats what the call politics is it? well then i hate itt! i never never never dreamt that such a neat equation with this collegue that i have would be soo ugly, and i just hate him so much now for it.. i hate the site of him, i hate it when he opens his mouth, i hate to lisn to him i hate to talk to him, it just all seems so fake when he even smiles!!, and if it was just work he shud hav had d guts to say it in front of me, he aneways is old enough to have htat authority, then y;d he talk ill in front of others behind me.. and that too of somehting i;ve no done??? y !?

well this is the second time... but i feel no less sick about it.. the only difference is the person involved.. poooooreee k poooore gandddee log yehi industry me aake base jaisa hai.. they dont mind lieing also? i mean.. come on.. dont they have a consciense?

it was a skip meeting with the hr and the tm for my pm, i missed it coz i had to leave early.. i was told today the details of the meeting.. and the highlight was.. that the pm got a clean chit.. well ok i dont mind that.. i wudnt neway have opened my mouth.. its appraisal time.. and no i dont want to risk it with him, no way! ya i get the truth bug tingling in but.. well neva mindi can make it shut up for a while if i see harm.. but whateva.. iw asnt there.. soud said that the pm shud distribute work well.. he was very expressive in stating that he had to come over weekends, he worked alone, he worked more( than he shud) just because work was not distributed.. now.. the needle that prick me!, he co ordinates his work.. only with.. Tasneem Begum!, so he indirectly meant he did everything.... and now since i obviously wasnt to shout at d top pf my voice that damnnnnnn this guy is lying!!!, its so dumb but hell.. how can u tak credit of another;s work? and even tlak of it???? how can u say u;ve done most of the work when for more than a week u;d come at 12 and leave at 5 ( therz n hourz lunch break and half n hourz cofee break included in that!), i soo soo wished that every piece of work would be penned and tagged to the name of the person whose done the job and then i;d see if he'd say the same thing.. i feeel sooooooooooooooo soo soooooo ahhh! pehle i felt bad coz i neva expected such breach of trust from this guy, nope absolutely not! next i thought he was gud enuf never to take anotherz credit (but somehow i saw this already fading in him, so this bit doesnt surprise me), i lukd up to him once upon a time, and now i feel eeeky to even look down on him.... kharaab dikha yaaroooo :(:( bhott kharaab dikhaa.. shheeeshhhh its a bad bad world with bad bad logg.. bohot bohot gannndeee loggg.. isme b hypocrisy :(:(, bad bad bad bad baddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddd

S.D.N.E.I.R.F

2008-04-23T15:50:00.002+05:30

I dont know why it happens that i write when i'm reminded that i must.. it is a mere conicidence perhaps that i'm told that i havent been here since long and i happen to drop by (drop by??? rnt readers suppose to drop by n writer be always there? bllaaa) that very day..
newyas.. ya.. somehting does pull me here whn i feel i have to let out encrypted thoughts, and no i dotn shy away from that.. i know i do it tactfully (really? huh!) and so u end up reading nonsense... neways... herez more coming up..

F.R.I.E.N.D.S- They love you but they are not your lover. They care for you but they are not from your family. They are ready to share your pain but they are not in your blood relation-- They are your F.R.I.E.N.D.S!!! True friends scold like a dad, cares like a mom, teases like a sister, irritates like a brother and finally loves you more than a lover

I read this piece kahin (OK!! someone sent it to me..) i was just wondering.. how;d it be when "F.R.I.E.N.D.S" scold like a dad when you actually need to feel the care of a mom, they tease you like a sister when you actually need a patient ear to just listen, or when they irritate while you are actually looking aorund for peace? bad na?... they r doing all the mentioned things.. but what if they dont come at the right time? may be thats y they say we must let TIME and talk nurture friendship...

khairrr...
Maassalaama!

Goshh, m getting DhAmKii's for this yaro!!

2008-04-03T17:17:00.003+05:30

ye kya baat huiiiii.. i've been juggling between itnee saare things, this n that and that n this.. n i get mails upar se.. wo bhi dhamki waale :P:P update ur blog or else..?? ahh :P:P:P... waiseee :D:D:D i'm honoured :D sheeeshhhh i dinnoo so many ppl out there miss readin my stuff (waise i think AnilZzZzZ will gimme dat yea yea rite luk now :P:P)

khair.. i really havnt got much to throw here.. i;ve been working.. bohot bohot bohot zyada actually.. bohot sara kaam, n upar se i get angry in the middle of duin it, coz i get d feel of.. huh ! Y ME!!! han theek hai.. i know dats bad.. but hey mine is genuine haan.. aise hi i dont say it.. khairr.. wont crib dekho abhi.. coz i;m at the end of it.. n since its moved well that i see i can scribble here for some seconds.. i wont do any nonsense here :D.. but ya.. the solaris build is on.. n i got to finish the windows build before i leave aj.. uparse i was asked to stay back, and i outrightly denied :D, upar se.. i still have the KT session to give.. n ya ALEX for windows me new bug milgaya! damn damn damn, when i;me ready n move it aside somehting new comes! err.. khair.. i dont know uska kya karsaktun mein.. magar i must :(
but ya the demo yesterday went very well.. n ya we had a meeting wid d TM wchih was soo so soo boring.. n believe me the atmosphere was soo soo tempting, i really cud steal a nap, magar nai hua, i was sitting rite under his nose :(, n yahan college type scenario bhi nahi hota dekho.. peeche jao n sojao ;);) hehehe.. waise.. ya i read this college kinda mail... nai fwd tha.. infact read two of 'em.. refreshing.. khairrrrr... bat kya thi....umm ek min.. my build is doen i guess...

hogya :D, han so where was i.. mmm kuch nai yaro.. sab in place.. n so many things running in my mind,

:( ahhh i hate interruptions!!
Ciao!

oh ya.. i frgott.. thank you all for waiting soo muchh.. ill wrap these things n get back in d flow ek dumm :)

prank

2008-03-28T16:53:00.003+05:30

I've never been part of such a prank, it was unbelievably hilarious!! i did mention of Manoj n how the guy loves to laugh about himslef n in the process make everyone else laugh, hez got this killing sense of humour, u just cant stop being influenced by his talk once u get to know him :) Cofee breaks are like his laughter pills for the entire team..
js a lil while ago when we were out.. he went missing.. everyone was asking where he is.. n then i asked too.. one of 'em asked me to call him, i said i dont have his number.. i was given a "YOU DONT???" look, n then Gayatri said ya, chalo call him n dumm karo use, i thought it was a dumb idea which she blurted out of boredome n it was definitely not to b implemented, but but but, surprisingly, after a while my fone was in her hand, n ya by then Manoj was back n sitting wid us.. the first few calls she gave kinda dint efect him, from the fourth one he got restless, n ya he was sharing it all wid us.. n mannnn was it hilarious, then it was in my hand n he lukd n was even talkin to me as i dialled n he still gave the "see see again!" expression.. it went on for very long n he finally took another team mates fone n called n he saw 'tasneem' there i guess n v all had a laugh..
his expressions his talk during all dat.. was.. gosh, everyone enjoyed, n he tuk it gracefully i guess..
it was superly dupersly dumb, but surprisingly it was so much fun :D:D

and and andd :D:D:D
i got a call from baba in th middle of d day aj :)
He said i had a call from my colleg, inviting us for an award ceremony for academic excellence n m gona be felicitated with a silver medal :D
n waise whn i rote this to my dost log, replies nahi aaye :-X !
ohhhhh there comes mansoz mail :D

adios!

A random thought of a desiring mind..

2008-03-27T10:58:00.003+05:30

The ability to convince is one attribute the possessor can cherish for life. It’s not surprising when u see people around you do something so easily, when the same thing to you seems more than impossible. Agree every individual possess a different caliber, a different thought process, a different personality all together, but that is perhaps where the psychological study comes into picture. On a very raw basis, to me this study is nothing but understanding another’s frame of mind, what they want and what they like.

The Human mind is designed beautifully. Keeping off from the neurological complexities it offers, one very simple attribute to the brain is the lovely compatibility it seems to have with the Heart. Now this is one thing we can exploit. You give the mind what it likes and you see it is satisfied. Sometimes you give the mind what it does not like, you may still see it is satisfied, that is perhaps because the Heart is satisfied. The emotional quotient is an important factor.

One can not propose a stratology on how to convince; all you got to do is state facts. What you ask of another person or what you expect from them is what you are trying to convince them for. Now the other view… does this other person seem ok with what you are asking for? Is he willing to give you what you require? Well, if the answer is yes don’t read on.. ‘coz we are talking of ‘convincing’ here, and if you just answered yes then your job is done, be at peace.. or may be you’d want to read further.. just to know…

Let’s sketch out some details… You have “something” to convince a “loved one” about. Now the something is what you will have to “beautifully portray” to your loved one. And if that is done, you’ve convinced them, ‘coz you’ve just showed their mind what it likes. But isn’t all that simple.. if it were then I wouldn’t have written this and you wouldn’t be reading this. Lets get a little deeper into that, what is to “beautifully portray” , well it simply means, show them “what they want”. And for this you MUST know “what they want”. When you know what they want, you know how to give it to them. BUT!!!!!!!! Again if it were so simple to give them what they want, there wouldn’t be a need to “convince”. If there are 10 things of what they expect, and you have just 5 out of those, then the first thing you do is, turn their attention towards the 5 things you already have. The regular human psychology is to concentrate on what is not present, and hence they fail to bank on that they actually have. And NO NO NO!! This is no theory, this is a fact. You put in everything to show or get the other 5 things, that you tend to forget what you have, so its like you loose out on polishing the shoe your wearing n polish all the other shoes on your shoe stand and you are still planning to buy two new pairs in spite that your bankrupt!

You love your wife, and she does not like the home you’re planning to buy (did I hear u say this is EXACTLY your problem?? Yea I know, this is one major issue we all fight over.. so read on). She just thinks you can get her something better, at a better location, at a better price, with better amenities. BUT remember this is what SHE thinks (although she might even have a list of such places). All you got to do now, is show her what she expects. Ok, its not by the sea side, but it still has her favorite kitchen garden. Showing her that this new place is for her and all its goodies are for her, is only what she needs to give you that nod. To show her that this place has everything she wants (except .. ok , say two things) and you promise to work on those two, and bingo she’s all yours. If you see those two things are something you might not be able to meet, then just throw in more glitter on the rest. MOVE MOVE MOVE her attention from what is not there to what is THERE.

So you actually have chalked out a strategy,
Postulate 1: DO NOT loose focus from the things you already have, do anything to hone those skills and show them up bright, they have to win your loved one’s attention
Postulate 2: work on what you do not have, and hey work hard to get it straight, remember, you still have not convinced.
Postulate 3: The mind gets easily manipulated by the Heart, come on!! use those skills of yours to manipulate that heart (oh yes, it is close to yours!!) so it helps manipulate their mind.

Try these with your pals (in the can’t we just go here instead of there!! situation), your boss (in the let me do it my way boss!!! situation), your mother (in the Come on mom, she’s a nice girl situation), father (in the I promise I’ll drive safely dad!!! situation), siblings (yea those annoying kid brothers, or sometimes irritating sisters, you’ll have a million situations you can relate to with them! )

weekend boredome.. soundz like hungama eh?

2008-03-23T18:14:00.001+05:30

What a weekend it was... i dont remmber being so bored n wanting so so so much to get back to office!! yea yea, u read that very very correctly!!.. itnaa dummm n itnaaa boredd.. i dont remmba whn i was!
Friday was fine.. i was bz wid stuff.. although lite nai thi hamare yahan for almost the entire day, i managed to keep myself engaged n it was nice infact.. kheer n poori etc. :D ab u know time n all to nikal hi jata usme.. ya by evening i was bored magar.. d major reason being the current! gosh it was so bad.. dil bola jab chale jari wo gandi lite.. it was so so soo annoying n i obviously cudnt help missing office :(
khair.. evening me.. lite nai thi.. so amongsta candles we were all having our regular fights.. this n that ye n wo .. u know the typical bhai chaara requirement :D, my sister n dad were fuming over a very very very very veryyy dumb issue :D, n the reason was my yunger sister:D, it was like she tingled n boom they started.. n mum njoyd it as usual since she dznt havea say in it n she so much loves not to bother bout this bit atleast.. it was kinda messing up my plans though.. so i buggd my lil sis n we had a fight over why she bugged the two( my elder sis n dad) n made them yell.. after our mess, i told her my plan :D wich was to ask dad to let abu take us out for a drive since it was raining n lite to waise b nai hai... she agreed n now were trying to shoo both of them.. bla in vain!! they yelld n vented n this n that, n us dauraan.. my two nepehews were having the time of their life.. Rehan just cant stop running around anybody ( ya not even, a yelling father daughter pair :D) with his little umm what do icall it.. cycle bhi nai bolsakte yaroo usku... hmm may be it qualifies to be a .. umm i dont know its big enuf to me out of the toy category n its small so i cant call it his cycle.. khair.. n Fauzan, was bz wid his fone, he jus loves to shout so much when therz too much noise around alredy!!! , n isme.. my mumm jus luvss to steal a nap! kyaaa scene hai dekho, upar se my great brain tells me, i must still try asking dadzz permission! my goodnes!!
khair.. i managed to calm baji down tellin her i wanted to ask him to let us go.. n u;ve alredy messd his mood... she dint want to let go the issue (belive mee it was so so soo soo so so so so sooooooooo dumb!) but agreed since i said we MIGHT go out.. so now they start bugging me.. poocho.. poocho pooochooo.. n i feel dumb to have sowed the idea in the first place.. hez awfull angry n fuming n i want to seek permission for somehting he wud deny in the best of his moods! huh! how dumb Tasneem!

khair.. i went ns at beside.. v had a little talk about here n there.. he seemd calm now.. my sisterz were still peeping thru n aise zabardast ishaare i tell ya! gosh!! they;d neva loose a dumb charade's game perhaps!! so i finally asked.. he gave me a point blank NO, n said necklace road ka mahole ajkal accha nai hai beta, waise bhi barish hori kya karte jake.. i dint say a word, lingered there for a lil more while n walkd out.. n my sisterz kinda were happy that he dint agree ( u know that wala happiness ki dekho he dint lisn to u :P:P:P) but they were also sad that he dint agree so v cudnt go out...

lite ka naam o nishaan nai hai han abhi tak bhi ( see how annoying!!) we continued our nonsense talk i mean sister log n mum.. n then suddenly i heard baba say, kya karte beta ye time neklace road jaake :D n there was pin drop silence now :D:D, i said kuch nai baba, barish hori na, utarte nahi gaadi me se, bas ek icecream khaaleke aate i said.. n then he said.. Abed, leke jaon inlog ko.. bingo!!! hahahahahahah! i jumped frm dat bed n almost hit the chandelier upar ka, :D.. waise to lite thi nai, it ditn take us much time altough we had to hunt for our abayaz, we managed to get them, but nowww.. another thing! baji said she wont come! now i was reallyyyy mad, but surprisingly she was more mad! she yelled at me, tumhari bat suneee meri baat nai sune babaaaa.. lollll n i laughed for soo long, although i teased her enuf for tha, i also got nice spankings for it, she luvs using her hands harshly on me, but it dznt hurt much coz i know its cmin my way :D n the reason usually is superly duperly silly.. n so was this.. anyways.. its took us few minutes to manaaofy her come wid us.. n she finally agreed( she obviously had to :D it was one of those typical tantrums of hers :D) n we went... n all of us like the chudva we get there.. n then we had ice cream.. n ya.. nott o forget, i dont know y but abed is so so fond of playing this one song especially when hez driving his sisterz somehwere, he luvs playing atif aslam's hum kis gali jaa rahe hain, n he puts it on such a high volume n thankfully he ensures the windows r shut, but ya .. we sing along with d song.. it somehow always seem to fit into d situation :D

hmmmmmm
khairr.. aisa kuch tha friday.. i wanted to rite bout the entire weekedn ka boredome, but friday hi aisa tha, now utna boring nai lagra actualllyy.. but yaa.. sat n sun i did NOTHING, NOTHING AT ALL, n i so so missd office, n whn i stepped in aaj morning, i felt.. umm ya.. relieived :D

waise i had serious thoughts to pen down ajj.. ab mood change hogya.. soo.... hmmmm.. anotherrr timeeee

Massalaama!

A Big Big Girl in a Big Big World

2008-03-18T10:34:00.004+05:30

... I am a Big Big Girl
In a Big Big World ...
... Its not a Big Big thing
If you leave me …
… But I Do Do feel that
I Too Too will Miss You much …
.. Miss You much ..

.. I can see the first leave falling
Its all so Yellow & Nice ..
.. Its So very cold outside
Like the way I am feeling inside ..

... I am a Big Big Girl
In a Big Big World ...
... Its not a Big Big thing
If you leave me …
… But I Do Do feel that
I Too Too will Miss You much…
.. Miss You much ..

.. Outside its now raining
and tears are falling from my eyes ..
.. Why did it have to happen ..
Why did it all have to end ..

... I am a Big Big Girl
In a Big Big World ...
... Its not a Big Big thing
If you leave me …
… But I Do Do feel that
I Too Too will Miss You much…
.. Miss You much ..

.. I have ur arms around me
oooooooooh like fire ..
.. But when I open my eyes
you're gone ..

I dunno whoz sung it.. but i just love the way she says the second miss you much :).. beautifully sung :)

dhoop n a crazy bhai, upar se image designing!! soncho my haalat :(

2008-03-18T10:15:00.002+05:30

Long time no see.. kya hora mekuu.. summer buqar? sheesh.. its so hot ajkal bahar.. the little time dat i spend out.. ya a less than two minute walk to the cafeteria.. seems like a punishment in that scorching heat ! i;m not exaggerating, meku sachme waisi lagraa.. ab pata nai sachme dhoop effect yaa. aur mera dimaagh garam hai... hmmm

:D isnt it nice if u get up galti se in the middle of the night and check the time n u realise, you have a wholeeeeeee hour left to get up :D.. well.. has happened wuite a few times wid me.. but when it happened last nite.. i felt nice :):) bohot nice :) i slept really early last nite.. bout 9 or so.. n then i happn to get up at 4, i checkd the time n i went :D:D:D:D n slept again :)

last evening i went hoome wid my bhai, n i dunno wat was with him, he actually decided to take me all the way from tolichowki to jublee hills n b hills n wahan se home.. n i asked why, he said he dint like the traffice between mehdpatnam to asifnagar! how dumb is dat now? i thought he was crazy.. he actually was i gues.. i almost fell off he was driving reallyy fast, i dunno wat was with him.. we went over dat umm i dont know wat area it is.. u know the apollo hosp ka peeche ka side.. umm hakeempet n all i gues.. not sure.. anewyas.. it was all hilly han, upss n downzz.. maagr roads acche khaase banadiye wahaan ye log... hmmm so a ride in the evenign wahan se was a good site, he stopped ocassionally.. umm nah not stopped, slowed down .. so i cud see the city seemed all lit up u know.. it was beautiful :)

m back to image designing yarooooo :(:(:( i soo soo soo hate it... i wish it were like doing it from the scratch :( wahi boring images to theek karna kate.. dummm dummm dummm hota meku usse.. khairr.. last time it was nice, i made another guy do it :D.. dint manage to this time magar :(

khair.. i have htis nice lil song i got from a loved one :) i dunno whose it is.. its just nice.. n i luvd it :).. will put it up here soon :),

untill thenn... AdiosSsSsS...

eyes dat made me smile :)

2008-03-13T12:17:00.002+05:30

Its been long time, said manso.. i really havnt scribbled here since long 'eh? hmm not dat i dint hav stuff.. i guezz iw as lazy.. there was this one thing last weeknd wich happnd n i thot i;d blog it..

i was with mum for her regular check up.. watiing anxiously for our turn(ye usual hai han, itneeeeeeee log rehte wahann k bas, khairr.. ) it was finally our turn n i stepped in with my mum, the chair beside mine was empty, another few minutes, and i saw a man walk in, he sat there comfortably.. he was holding a black bag that had some papers i gues.. he seemed at peace, wasnt really fiddling with anything ( unlike the usual fiffling with d hands n legs dat ppl tend to do when they r 'waiting').. i realised he was smiling suddenly, i dint know for what.. then i turned to luk at him.. untill then i dint actually luk.. i cud js feel his presence n cud make out wat he was duin coz he was right beside me.. but when i looked at him.. i smiled too.. a rather broad one than his.. i dint know he was blind, he seemed so normal in everything that i just dint notice until i actually put in some effort to look at him. later i was surprised he was'nt accompanied with n escort either, he came alone..... i dotn know what made him smile suddenly, but his smile did bring a smile on my face.. i felt a lil stupid though.. but it only broadened my smile.... it was his turn, an attender came by to help him reach the doctor's desk, he sat on the chair very carefully, he was facing the wrong direction.. the doc started talkin to him , n he then turned to d right one.. i smiled again :), seemed like he was a regular patient, i was suprised howcome i never saw him here considering i;ve been accompanying mom since quite a few years..

later he walked out.. n stood there carefully opened his bag, n removes a folded stick, he tried to remove some rubber band kind of thing tied to it, in order to unlock it i gues.. but the stick fell frm his hand, n dats when everyone else in the hall noticed him n realised he doeznt have eyes, n so one of them near him piked it up n then he straightened it n walked past... i dont know if he kepts otherz thinking too.. but he did atleast to me... hmm it was nice..

khair.. u know wat happnd yest?? huh, perhaps d most stupid ever thing, i dint know what to call, but now i think ill call it gossip (thankz to anilzz) i was wid a collegue and her friend, we were returning after breajfast, i dont know wat went on but the lady suddenly asked me, so u do your shopping from london i heard (!!!!!!!) n i went.. really???? (not aloud han.. js to myself) .. i was wondering.. people around here actually notice what others wear n even talk about where they rpoabbaly bought it from.. and EVEN PASS IT ON?? hahaha.. i almost laughed, but controlled thinking it wud offend the lady (i dint know her enuf, she was my collegue's frnd) i smiled and she asked, oh,. not london? some other foriegn place hi naa.. i know i know she shook her head.. n i dint say anything after that.. lolll

eeeeee mansoooo.. dont bug me like dat to finish quickly :P:P time lagta hai yaa.. i do other things wile postin yaa :P:P:P

das all fr now folks!

Adioss

Bin Tum [ again ;) ]

2008-03-05T17:32:00.004+05:30

aankhon mein intezaar ke baadal baras gaye
aankhon mein intezaar ke baadal baras gaye
hum dekhne ko aapka chehra taras gaye
bin tum gumsum hone lage, jaane kis dunya me khone lage
bin tum gumsum hone lage, jaane kis dunya me khone lage

resham se dil ke ye rishte, rishton ki naazuk dore
is dore pe jaane jaana chalta nahi koi zore
tujhe dhundti hai nazre zara saamne to aa
bebas hai dil ye mera dil thaamne to aa
saare jahan mein tum hame tanha sa kargaye
bin tum gumsum hone lage, jaane kis dunya me khone lage
bin tum gumsum hone lage, jaane kis dunya me khone lage

aankhon mein intezaar ke baadal baras gaye
aankhon mein intezaar ke baadal baras gaye

bheegi bheegi lagti hai raatein dilbar teri yaad mein
tu hi chupa rehta hai shayad meri har faryaad me
tu kareeb dil ke itnaa hai meherbaan mere
mein sunu teri wo baatein jo mann me tu kahe
kis darjah dekho tum meri dhadkan me bas gaye
bin tum gumsum hone lage, jaane kis dunya me khone lage
bin tum gumsum hone lage, jaane kis dunya me khone lage

aankhon mein intezaar ke baadal baras gaye
aankhon mein intezaar ke baadal baras gaye

well... this was it.. :D :) bout d earlier post :D
hmmm anymore charcha on that nowwww???? :D:D:D:D

Bin Tum

2008-03-03T13:21:00.003+05:30

I dont know how well i can do this.. but i really want to pen down this anxiety..

i look for those eyes that i know are looking at me from somewhere, i dont know why, i dont how, i'm just waiting for this wait to end.. its like i see him now and i dont the next moment.. i want to, just want to be with him, hear him talk to him laugh with him cry with him...... my heartz pounding waiting to b touched, to b held to feel that warmth to experiance that peace to reach the end of this endless void, how;d you leave me alone in this whole wide world.. :( .. my days and nights are so lonely without you, how is it that your so close to my heart and not near me now.. you are hidden in every prayer of mine.. i think of you beg for you.. i dint realise when i surrendered to you.... without you i'm alone, i dont know where i;m lost..

Gosh.. i know i screwed it up :D:D:D

this was an attempt to summarize the feel of a song i'm goin gaga over since some days now.. but i actually realised.. :D i really really messed it up.. :D..

will put down the lyrics sometimes soon.. untill then.. umm.. Alvidaa! ( this song is on, so i thought it fits in! although i know its a lil bhaari cz i know m gona cm back very soon :D)

n oh ya! i'd like to know ap sab ke very first reactions after the first few lines of this post.. :D

Integrity bluezZzZ

2008-02-29T10:00:00.003+05:30

I dont know why he said that, and i dont know why he was looking at me while he said it.. We were revising the implementation proposal for the fourth time i guess, it was suggested that i shud restructure the estimates without deducting any hours. I already thought mine was n exaggerated estimate ( n yea i was asked to revise it n cut it down, then again someone else cut it further down.. but somehow its gonna sour down to become that bad, m soo dead sure bout it!) aneways... they said they forgot to bill in for the document preperation.. n since i was doing it.. i was to add it in... Naidu peeped frm his cube n said, ya put in 30 hours for u and soud each, i js gave him the ok luk to continue wid my wrk, then he looked at me and said.. well i know its cheating, but we still got to do it, i want to bill them well this time he said.. dat kinda gave me n eeky feelin, y'z he tellin me hez cheating n he knows bout it too.. that reminded me , this was the same guy talkin to me bout integrity issues an year back.. n luk who talks of cheating now...

i;ve got a kingsize bug! i;ll get back laterZzZzZz

Hamesha mine !!! KYUNNNNN?

2008-02-25T11:47:00.003+05:30

Gannnnnnnnnnnndaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa hai ye Wiproooooooo ! I just hateeeee hate hate hateeeeeee hateeeeee hatee and more more more more moreeee hateeeeeeeeee the people here! ek se badke ek chor'z these people are! i dotn believe they;d stoop down to this level ! come on! who'd i trust????
:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(
i'm really really reallllllyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy mad at these guyz! they ruined my monday morning! damn i hate 'em all so much.. i wish i;d see d fella who did it, i;d jsu give him the look he;d never imagined to see, he;d fall on his feet and swear never to do such a thing again !! i hateeeee 'emmmmmmmmmmm :(:(:(:(:(

meraich milaa thaa kyaa :(:(:(
kya hua malumm :(:(:(:( boht bura huaaaaaaaaaaa ! aaakhri phiriwi hai meri abhi !!
therz this lil chord i use to connect my headfones to my machine, headfonez chote hain :( they wudnt reach the systm neeche :( so i had a chord to connect it... aur yeeee ghaleezzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz choran :(:(:( some one cut it !! can you belive that, ok churaalete to theek tha ( nai theek nai tha magar come on!! ) they actually cut it using a plier i guess, n it was so neatly done, as if they wanted to use it for something! one piece of it, i found thrown near dusri chir in another cubicle.. n my headfonez removed carefully n kept alag se, but man why did they have to cut it!! leke use karke laake rakhdena tha naaaaaaa :(:(:(:(:( kyun kyun kyunnnnnn karte mere sath :(:(
i wrote d security guyz the img guyz, the suvidh a guyz, the fmg guyz, eveyone everyone!! a mail. they;d better gimme a new one now( not that they provided the earlier one! but this, i will have it from them for sure!! ) pehle bhi someone stole my headfonez :(:(
n may be, some morning if i find my mouse missing or my keyboard's cable cut some day, i shudnt be surprised! huhhh!

F.R.I.E.N.D.S

2008-02-22T09:38:00.002+05:30

I never thougt i'd wonder about something that seemed (!!!!!) i paused for long to fit in some word, but i realized i actually ran out of 'em.

Friends were always a part of life, they were always there, and to me that always meant, 'in good times' ok, may b not just 'in good times' may b it is 'all times except bad times'. I dont know if;d be exaggerating, but i dont really remmber when my friends saw me in pain/anger/hurt/worried/crying (na not fr smthn silly)... nah, it aint their fault.. its me, i dont know why, i just never showed, i never wanted to. but ya m sure i ditn let them down, i've been blessed to have such beautiful peopela round me who find me so much worthy that they share their very very important decissions, seek advice, or just cry, i can't explain how it feels to be there for someone when they r dat low, n nither can i explain how difficult i see it to actually let go emotions before your friends.

Its awlays been like, people come and people go... i just turn back, i see fading footsteps too, i see smiles i see cries, but surprisingly i also see some of 'em still there.

I dont know why, but i really find it astonshing that we can hold on to people for years together. Its different scenarios when its family, u actually live together and the emotion quotient there is different from that we;d share with friends.

Aint it a nice feeling to just call up someone and yell at them for no reason and bang the fone down again, n still be assured u can call back when ur ok just to say sorry, and u'll see nothing changed. although i have'nt tried this, i feel good just thingking of it :)

Its so nice when you can just call up and say, i want to cry i dont know why, and even if i do, i wont tell you why, so please dont ask. :D i;ve tried this, infact this was like one of those times i felt like M I REALLY DOING THIS!!??

i'm not surprised that i pause and wonder how people around me found me so worthwile :) but its beautiful to feel your loved and trusted and cared for.

but yea, m still learning to let go.. :)

may i have your attention --- "!!?!!"

2008-02-15T11:36:00.004+05:30

I dont know whats with this thing to seek attention before one would begin a conversation with someone. Well ok, in a gathering it might be required, when you ant to speak to them all, you obviously would require their attention before you begin your talk.. but how bout it, when its a one to one conversation? hmm , well.. may be its ok ( not necessarily required though). you could just start talking to the other person cant u? hmmm, ya if you see him/her engaged ( to the extent that it seems they are actually engrossed and not just engaged) in somehting, then you really need to do something to grab attention before you have your word.

hmm now a nice one-- how exactly do u seek attention?
1. An excuse me .... is too formal i guess
2. Hello? hmm ya would be fine, but not when the talk is too frequent.. u cant actually keep saying hello to the same person again n again ( ina span of say 2 hours, n u talk to them at.. intervals of say.. half n hr or 45 minz?)
3. A pat on the table with a pen ( or just ur finger, but hey! loud enough to have n impact han :D)?? ( :D this onez very practical, and my team mate always uses it wid me :D:D coz my headfones r always on, n he actually needs to do that to get my attention :D) so its a tried n tested idea, but ensure that its used in a similar situation, else its the most stupid way to do it !
4. Ok this onez the ultimate one! n to me, its the most annoying one too !, i dont even know what to call it, its like apna gala saaf karre koi before they sing ( umm i dont know if i've conveyed the message rite) u know that sound they make just before they reach you or look at you or turn towards you... its like n indicator ki, hey m here, look at me or lisn to me!.. i dunno it somehow is soo soo wierd n silly, but so very widely used.
5. hmm what i;d prefer? Just say the name, u have the person;s attention all for you. simple nai? but i hardly see it bein used ( i know you wudnt agree) but js look around, m sure u;ll hear more of 'hey!' or hello ( no not as a way of greeting, wo to chalta wn u see sm1 the first time or not very occasionally int he day) or 'ehm ehmms' or mediators beechme tellin you ( or somtimes just pointing at the other person who requires ur attention!! )

hmmm khair.. this js cliked to me wn i heard the same 'ehm ehm' (which my team mate uses js before he has smthin to tell me) n i turned to him but realised that he dint actually want my attention that time... :)

are they born tihs way!?

2008-02-13T17:49:00.004+05:30

Double standards-- Y ??? i hate cribbing htis way i just hate it so much, but i cant help it one bit, and no this aint the first time either, it happens time and again n i tell ya i foolishly let it go ! not that i know what i should do , but hey, i;ve put in effort too, y does someone else ALONE get the cherry on the cake? typical corporate politics scenario i know, but hey a word of appreciation is not gonna cost him a penny's worth then hell y !
ok i was appreciated when i wrked too, i do not deny that, but the point is, all that goes in the drain when the entire credit is handed over to another( although i do appreciate his efforts too ) but damn my manager!! i hate him, coz he gosh ( i feel tacky talking about it, feel like a miser begging for appreciation! damnn i dont need his! i hate him i hate him i hate him!) but i can not deny, i got really mad when i read the mail that gave jus one fela the credit of the whole work package whn i slogged over it for so long... it just pulls u down man! y d hell do u think i;ll work now!
fine!! he now wants estimates for the next work package! now he'll get ;em frm me!

by the way.. i was off this place for long coz i ditn feel like riting, iw as jus rearranging stuff n i;ve moved my poetry collection ( my poetry! my godd!! kitna bhaari bhaari sa lagra huh! ) to a new blog, i;ve linked it up from here.. not that i;ve added anything new there.. ya have put in pics wid 'em as per Anilz suggestion :) )

oh ya, i frgot to mention :D
it rained sooooooooooo heavily aj :) .. i'll tell ya the whole thing ruko...
the current was off since last nite ( i dint realise when it actually got turned off, but it was off for more than 3 hrs past midnite.. n it was like that until the wee hours of morning), n iw as praying that something massive must have happened that would result in a blackout sorts, so no current in hyd atleast for aj, so no power to systems n soo so soooooooo no work :D, han, i was thinkin bout this in the middle of the nite whn i got up fr a glass of water n realised ki current nai tha, n whni chekd the time it was bout 3.30 or so i guess.. .. khair.. aisa to nahi hua.. :D
neways.. i got up n it was raining ( it hink raat bhar hui baarish) after Fajar, i jsut oepend the door n sat on the step in the aangan wishing i woudnt have to go to off :(, but hten i saw the time n it was 7.10 already, i realised i must rush to get ready else m gona have a bad time catching the bus (i;ve been walking to my stop n it takes me 20 min :(, dont ask me y m walking!! sab gande auto waalon ki galti hai!! milte hi nahi subah ke time! ) khair... i was ready by 7.25 ( ya i dont take zyada time :D) so i had another 5 mins, i slippd my burkha on, n i lukd outside n man was it raining heavily.. woooooooooooooo time up.. ghar jana haiiii
but hey
maze ki baat to ye thi.. k i somehw managed to call my cousin imran n he was awake bechara n he drove me to the stop n it was sooo much fun ( iw as dripping yarooo ) khair.. my fone fell in a puddle of water :(:(:( ( it sounds terrible now, goto get it chekddd... ) sheeshhhhh 6.10 hogaye yaro.. osrry jana hai...
another timeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.....

5 KyunZzZzZz

2008-01-30T09:22:00.000+05:30

Insaannn, what a species, what a creation, so much to it, and nothing at all, it has so much in hand, but nothing he can call his?(*!!!*). somtimes the easiest of things seem like a mystery, or its just that we tend to luk at it in a way that it unfolds that way?(*!!!*). U know, ur sure, ur told, and its more than evident that something is to happen in a certain way, y still after that point one tends to overlook (nah) ignore( nah) dont care (yea may be! ) bout it n venture into what you were told not to? Dumb na? Sooooo human !! kyun magar? aisa hamesha to nahi hota, i mean one doesnt react the same in every situationt hat has a similar context and question.. then ?

ab dekho, therz tihs really good looking well n bohot saara paani usme, but ur told or u know or u js get to know somehow, that even after u reach that well, ur not gona get uska paani.. fir, kyun jana bolo wahan? ok, u like it, its nice, accha ai, jo bhi hai, the ultimate goal ( yaani k paani ) is not gona b met, then??? why head in that direction at all? i mean.. dekho, simple si baat hai na, jis gali jaana nahi, us raaste ko dekho bhi kyun? ( kuch hai wo muhaavra, i know i messed it, but htis suffices my purpose :D)

magar han, it also is true, that one woudnt do the same thing for every situation na, ab when u know smthing is wrong u wudnt go ahead n do it for nothing haina... ye situation bhi similar hai, the difference is, it aint as harsh as differentiating gud n bad, its js dat, kuch milne ka nahi hai to kyunnn jaooo? n it dznt end there han. inpite the question, inspite the answer, u still go !! kyunnn???

may b more on this later.. i know i still havent put my tangled bundle of nerves out yet! so aur baaqi hai :D, kaam hai abhi.. wil get back..
untill theenn!! may b u can count the number of kyun's i've used :D, ok, now i know what ican name this :D

(: SaTuRdAy YeLlOwZzZz:)

2008-01-26T17:01:00.000+05:30

Aashayen khile dil ki, ummeeden hasen dil ki :)

hey, this was a part of that questionnaire we had for the Antakshiri prelims :D, accha tha yaro wo, but :( ya we wernt thru it :( so .. v cudnt sing :D , khair.. they call it 'blues' when they r sad, what color do they call it when not sad? may b its pink for happy, but,, what do i call it for now?ummm.. han shayad yellow shud do..? :D Saturday yellows :D, han ye theek hai :). . ..

Saturday bhi nahi chut ta dekho ye machine :P, addiction? or is it js dat m heading to smthn like, cant stay widout it? eh huh, exaggerating perhaps :S
hmm i was js llukn thru my folder, js n year back i supposdly had js a folder on my name n iw as supposd to dump in everything i possiby can into it, n now i actually hav a whole machin at wrk, earlier, i;d b excited to be given a chance to access my computer ( yea hum bhai behen bohot ladte the for that, v'd have to take turns :D) n now i spend a whole day over it, 5 days a week ! man a year n so much change :), that folder of mine... gosh, it had soo many things ( it still does) all my eminar reports, my presentations( atleast 3 of 'em two rogh n one final draft ehehe:D) my work meaning assignments, n what a variety yaa, sooo soo much there, n how come i was neva still tired? i dotn remmba complaining, i;d have so muchhh fun, n now lukin at it i feel.. wooo did I do all that?? hehe
Emotional Intelligence in Machines, we presented a paper on that in our tech fest, v got a consolation then... later v presented it in another college;s tech fest, we got First prize :D i luk at it now n smile :D,.. DNA computing, yea dat was my smeinar topic for the 4/2, kya kyaaaa karti thi yaa mein... n abhi dekho... therz a wierd still a some dumb stand, nothing like enthu perhaps, a deserted brain or a typically programmed one that seems to head towards a stagnating end? ummm grrmm, sounds bad :D
janedoo.. chalo bas hai abhi. bubye :)
n by the way! Wipro blocked blogspot again !! although i can post, i cant see my published blog..

Adios ;) n yea, i know what m gona name this post :D

2008-01-20T10:13:00.000+05:30

Before your death

The truth that we are aware of
Life that we know shall come to an end
Nothing in hands we shall have then
Deeds they say shall speak there-on

Sad it is that we still pay no heed
We sure were told what we must read
But still we just pile up more weed
We don’t realize, it is our need

There shall come an hour verily we were told
To prepare for it and ourselves to mould
To stand before the Master of the world
For it is Him alone we can hope to hold

Another chance we shall not get
To live again in this world He shall not let
Make haste and pray for what you fret
Before your death and you are met

ye n wo

2008-01-14T18:04:00.000+05:30

quite a few things here... ek to ye.. ki my team mate, Uma (now if he does a CTRL +F for his name, he'll find it ;) ) was trying to find out wat omnidaemon meant coz he heard us talk about it so much.. .. so he googled it.. n loll guess wat he came across.. hahah my blog !! now it showz ! :D

waise weekend was very nice... fri exi.. sat golconda outing wid frndz( cant really elaborate on thiss.. magar yarooo mazaaa aagaya :):) ) sunday.. hehe shahrukh khan treattt, devdas, K3G, ek aur aari thi yarooo.. mmm yad nai aara nam .. hmmm ... ya.. Veer zaaraaaa :):) .. so it was srk all sunday :):):):)

aj.. hmm kam wam.. n this n that.. but i was told i cant help myself although i solve many things for otherz.. :( khair..

time hogya.. jare hum.. tataa!

another piece of nonsense (read 'no sense') :D

2008-01-10T17:38:00.000+05:30

i dont really like to have the feleing of my machine being overlooked.. n dis moment.. its smthin exactly like that.. i feel sm1z lukin peeche se.. tryin to peep a my screen, thank god this aint my real waali place...

my system crashed :D, i was workin on it.. n i truned to talk to my team mate, i turned wapas.. n saw.. my machine.. :D black out :D, the memory slots r a problem it seems.. n so the motherboard requires change, n a call has been logged with the vendor n its expected.. umm.. 2 3 days me kate :D.. waise he told me smthin similar earlier also.. but it was fine by evening...

khair.. m at gayatriz machine abhi to.. n dekhte hain. kab theek hota hai sab...

actually na ( ok m gonna blabber nonsense now).. you somtimes do things u;d hate just a lil later than you;ve done them. Its so human i know... but it aint very good... i don think i like it... u cant help it either.. it just happens.. u dont know why, you don know how, and sometimes you dont even know what.. but it still happens.. ( PAuse: the IMG guyz here.. hez got a spare motherboard kate.. :-~) ya so where was i... in the middle no where..

its like blaaa life.. n bluu life.. n wateva hell.. n nonense i tell ya at times.. u don like his u dont like that.. n smtimes whn u do... umm well.. janedoo..

duhh ! theek hogya.. m at my machine..

anyways... u dont know wat to do u dont knowa where to go, u want it to hold on u also want it to finish, u want to stay u want to leave u want to move n u also want to b still... how on earth do u think ur gona get everything ek saath?
nothing at all happens n u just complicate it all soo soo so much for urself, not just that, the bad thing of it is, it has n aweful aweful impact, sometimes irrepairable damages, u talk nonsense n later regret but that is all, u can only regret, nuthin perhaps to undo it... y y y should otherz be at the recieveing end of ur nonsense? not fair na.. ? u;d hate it if u;de b in their shoes, but u still dont think.. u know it all, but, u still dotn care? no... it aint that u dont care, but y should... neva mind...

peace, important nai?
waise mum called .. dont miss the bus aj bolke :(

ta taa!

Alumni Meet.. mazaa aagya :)

2008-01-07T09:47:00.000+05:30

kuch yaadein bhulaaye nahi bhulti, kuch waqt roke nahi rukta...
Sometimes you so soo sooo much want something to come back.. n most of the times.. its tim well spent.. its time thats gone.. time that ur sure is never to come back, but u stil so so sooo much wish you could hold on, so much wish u can peek into it again, just a a glimpse of the past gives you those goose bumps n dat feel of wanting to stay back n never to return...

hmmmm.. yai was kinda feelin dat way.. ova the weekend.. had my Alumni meet, n it was soo soo soo nice being there with all of them again.. back to my old class, arre.. hamari class ku lab banadiye wo log.. n therez a whole new block now.. poore ke poore 7 floors! my goodness.. n the ramp is gone.. therz a new canteen.. but that slope up n down to our blocks is still the same.. the parking shed is still the same.. the guy who used to stand there is still the same.. the chemistry labb.. mann!! hehe wo bhi waisa hi hai.. the LR was locked.. the pharmacy block is in place.. the old canteen ke pas kuch shed sa banadiye.. n kuch naye seediyan hai wahan.. hmmm the library area.. hehe the place we'd call LP ( short fr lover;s point ;) saare copules wahin milte the :D:D n saare badmaash n padantuz bhi wahin milte the.. the badmashz were there to spy on the couples.. n padantuz ke liye to library jaane ka raasta hi thaa !! ahhhhhhhhhh kya din the yaaaa..

most of them turned up.. even the married ladies( 2 of 'em) were kind enuf to come over for while.. they left jaldi magar.. the lecturers r the same.. the auditorium :D wo bhii.. sab sab sabbb itna accha laga ki bas.. it was like.. sooo gud to see everything n everyone together.. Nad bhai was in town, he had given me his numbr.. i dint call him fr long.. n then yad aya so i called him up dat morning ( ditn tell him my name ;) ) although he had a hint it was me he wasnt sure, n he was kinda hunting ke kaun hai wahan pe.. khair.. mile unse bhi bohotttt accha laga.. me n juvi went around poooora campus.. oour classes the labs , the machines we did our project on.. it woudl be nice if far would come.. she cudnt make it magar :(.. accha tha yaa sab.. the cse girls had turned up too.. kafi log the.. sab se milke it was liek.. woowww.. :):):):) i cudnt stop smiling.. n then the show was nice too.. there were some performers.. hyderabadi ishtyle me guftgu.. aisi kuch tha.. the laughter challenge representatives of hyderabad were there to entertain us.. n hmmmmmmm aur ek bohottttttttt acchi bat bhi thi joo bohottt acchi lagi :):):):):)..

arre haan.. i also happnd to meet that junior of mine.. that was such a funny encounter.. after i lost my pehle wala number, we lost touch, kal he was sitting at the entrace to register the guests.. n he insisted that we put in our names too.. i said ok n sat down, one glimpse of him n aisa laga.. i know this guy, kaun hai magar.. yad nahi aya tab but.. n he asked my name n i said it n i lukd at him again, he gave similar 'i know u i guess' looks, then the other things n then he went liek... 'ap .. baji hai?' n i went ya!! yaad aaya! Aziz!!! lol.. n i sat there for a wile tlakin to him n he kept yelling kya hai number badaldiye call nai kuch nai bla bla.. accha tha yaroo.. sab kuch bohot bohot bohotttt accha tha :):):):):)

chalo.. have kam for the day.. :)
may b i'll b in those MJCET special effects for d day ;)

Massalaama !!

She

2008-01-03T09:52:00.000+05:30

She thought she was in wonderland
At ease and peace with all in stand
Dew drops glittering on glossy green grass
Nature enthralling that took her in trance

Flowers that bloomed smiling at her
Birds seem to sing welcoming her
How was everything so perfect
Why did everything seem so correct

She sat under the shade of a tree
And noticed something come beside
A squirrel perhaps was back from its ride
It also seemed in a lively spree

It looked at her and ran around
Went back to hide and made some sound
Its gleaming eyes peeped at her
She thought it was in some kind of a stir

She breathed a sigh, the one of grief
And thought for a while about her strife
The solitude now was called loneliness
The peace she felt was now distress

She breathed again, this time of relief
And thought again this time in belief
A minute it took to get back her smile
She realised it wasn't worth that mile

A lesson she seemed to learn that day
Live in the present, keep the past at bay
When she smiled at life it showed her wonders
She finally learned to enjoy those thunders

P.S: Shubha, dont ask me why, but i just like to dedicate this one to you :)

%%%%% - i realised i neva had these kinda titles ;)

2008-01-02T17:42:00.000+05:30

Sometimes you dont understand whats wrong with you, or may be its just dat you think somethings rong wid you n may be nuthing really is all that rong.. but still the mind percieves it that way n there ur heart takes u to the sadder side of lala land where u kinda question urself, whats rong, m duing things that hurt so much.. but wat did i do? its like.. u do smthin n they dont like it n u dont know y they dont like it.. ?
umm .. jaanedoo..

waise.. i was told sm1z happy wid meeeee :D

chalo ghar jana hai..

Adios!!

Bohot din baad...

2007-12-31T14:40:00.000+05:30

I've been off here since soooooooooooooooo soooooooooooo sooooooo long naiiii.. sheesh, ya.. it included my 8 day off from work :D:D:D thats jus 5 leaves han, baaki teen din.. :D sat sun n Christmas :D,
then i got bak on friday.. n fiirrrrrrrrrrrrrse do din ki chutti :D sat sun.. n then i got back ajjjj.. ab kal firrrrrrrrse chutttii :DD:D:D:D:D nice na :)

hmmm i dint do much.. actually i did too much n i remmba none.. NONE at all. :D eid was nice.. ab kya nice nakko poocho.. i cant really put in all d description here ( gosh etc? huh dnt expect elaboration there!! )

hmmm abhi to i'm fullllto yawning.. hey... new year resolutions anyoneee????? U know.. i had js thought of one hting... i dont know if i;d b able to put up wid it.. but i;ll try.. m planning not to every say bad bout my manager ( irrespective of how bad he is n all the bad things he'd do !!!), but cm to think of it... when i talk of him, it has to have smthin to do wid bad... coz i cant really help it.. he does it dat way.. ok.. i'll still try not to give my opinion on it... may b i'll hate him a lil lesser this year... ya.. i wont umm well bad mouth bout him.. n if any of u see me do it.. remind me of this :D, but ya i dotn promise not to ven mention what he does han.. :D

khair.. a whole year passed, it was the 2nd of Jan, i had a terrible time adjusting, i cribbed about why Bala had to move me from Avaya and send me here, n that time i dint realise sooo much would have happened.. my goodness.. 2007 surely has a lot, u know.. its like sooo much happened ... work wise home wise me wise.. ya,, boht kuch yaa.. sm of whihc i cn mention sm of which i dont want to nice gud stuff not so gud bad stuff... hmmm accha mixture tha..

khair chalo.. i cant put much lite.. i gues its been a very gud blogging year too nai.. kitnaaa likhi meinn.. :D

chalo.. Adios!

Ajjjjj kya huaa malummmmmmmmm :D:D:D

2007-12-13T17:12:00.000+05:30

Never did my day pass off itni jaldi at work.. n u know wat, aj to kuch kaam hi nahi tha :D then i duno how i managed to remain sooo bz :D

Swiped in, was pretty sure there wudnt b many mails.. n not any frm Finland atleast :D, i still checked out sm videos ( all my pending frwds u see.. abhi bohotttt baaki hain :) ) n one of them i watched was veryyy very nice, they named it.. the new anthem, will trying attahcing te video here.. last time i tried it dint work out... hmmm

I'm off music untill eid (:D) so no music either, was loged into messenger n mails dat was it, n ya was out fr juice in the morning, dint hav bf :(.. then ye wo kare tak cofee break :D n u know these ppl , they dont let me stay on!!.. got back.. n hit d mails again... n one of them haddddddd... :D:D:D:D:D yea.. this...

now.. do i need to say how i felt??? :D i jus replied saying.. MEKUUUU HONAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA :D:D:D:D:D

khiar.. the day moved on .. n lunch time.. namaz n headed to cafe.. n then after lunch.. i still cudnt stp thinkin of those :D, sooo.. sooo sooooo.. me, Rahmath n Firdous thought.. y nottt.. ummm yeaaaa!! h ehehe v rushed to our cubes, got our abayas, n were out tuk n auto and .. heheh yeaa.. hunted ofr the nearst mithai bhandar.. n thennnnn.. thisssssssss!!!

Dont remmba when i did smthin as stupid as this :D, magar maza aayaaa... :):):)

Mansooo.. to make your day :)

2007-12-11T12:32:00.001+05:30

aabad karte chale wo jahan bhi daali nazar
mehfil mehkaate chale aisa tha unka safar
nigaah e mohabbat ka kuch aisa hua asar
bewafaon ki mehfil me pighlaate chale har paththar

jhalak to jaise kaafi thi hi nahi
jalwe wo yun bikhraate chale
kahin muskuradiye to kahin se nazar pherli
unka hona hi jaise ek raushni si thi

khone ko kuch baaqi na raha
dil to wo churaate hi chale
hothon se kuch najaane kyun na kaha
apne aankhon ki chamak humse chupaate chale

Coffee gossips

2007-12-11T11:09:00.000+05:30

yea.. this is one thing common to corporates.. n i js got back from one such brunch... I wasnt really used to joining my team for coffee.. major reason language barrier! .. telgu pata nai kyun.. palle padti hi nahii !!.. khairr.. its just a few days since i started moving out with them for cofee.. i dont really remember y i suddenly switched and did not mind the language barrier, more so i happened to remember the fact that i can still be alone in a crowd...

aneways.. my people are considerate, they understand my facial expressions so well, n r kind enuf to translate, n somtimes i pik the english words they throw in wid thier telugu as they speak, n frame things out fr myself.. n most of the time they are laughing, bout soem joke ( not nasty or smthin infac it wudnt have any humorous content but i tell ya, the rest all they did to present it woudl make it hilarious! ) .. there are times i find myself wid a blank face when all of them are laughing n yea they are smtimes tooooo bz laughing not wanting to loose out on those moments ( of laughter ) that they do not translate it to me.. but ya.. i still laugh... nah.. not js to give company, i dont know.. they way they laugh is also funny enuf to make me laugh.. so its ok.. :)

therz one Manoj in our team, n he had his appraisal discussion yesterday.. so dat was the hot topic, n i gave strict instructions that its gona be in english!! n he obliged (although he always seemed to find it difficult to communicate in english coz he stuied in telgu since scool )..

I;m not sure if this is something easy or if it comes by practice or somthing... but.. how well do u think you can laugh at yourself (in public ofcourse! ) .. I realised its an art in itself... laughing at yourself yea!!.. i saw this in him today.. he seemed so easy witht the mess he was making out of himself n he continued to entertain.. he surely carved a niche for himself with that charisma of being clumsy that he treasures...

kya baat hai !!

2007-12-04T14:42:00.000+05:30

I dont remmber when i was knocked out by sm1 like this! man this is awsome... i dunno.. i js luvd it ! I ain tn ardent shaeri lover, but whni heard this guy ( the saddest part is i dont know who it is ! ) i went .. woooo!

i must tell ya.. the andaaz e bayaan is kaabil e taareef... here goes!!

koi deewana kehta hai koi paagal samajhta hai
magar dharti ki bechaini ko bas baadal samajhta hai
mein tujhse door kaisa hoon tu mujhse door kaisi hai
ye tera dil samajhta hai ya mera dil samajhta hai

ke mohabbat ek ehsaason ki paawan si kahani hai
kabhi Kabira deewana tha kabhi Meera deewani hai
yahan sab log kehte hain meri aankhon mein aansun hai
jo tu samjhe to moti hai jo naa samjhe to paani hai

ke samandar peer ka andar hai lekin ro nahi sakta
ye aansu pyar ka moti hai isko kho nahi sakta
meri chaahat ko dulhan tu banaalena magar sunle
jo mera ho nahi paaya wo tera ho nahi sakta

bhramar koi kumudni par machal baitha to hungama
hamare dil mein koi khwaab pal baitha to hungaama...
abhi tak doob kar sunte the sab kissa mohabbat ka
mein kisse ko hakeekat mein badal baitha to hungama

bhaiii mazzzaaaaa aagya! ;)

Phantasm of Love

2007-12-04T12:28:00.000+05:30

With grace she walked down the moon
And elegance that would cast a swoon

Beauty elite in the star studded night
Seemed like pulchritude was there to flaunt its site

She held his hand and he swirled her around
Under the moonlight and love to surround

With patience and ease, they danced with th breeze
Mesmerized and lost in each others thoughts

In heaven as they felt with bounties svelte
Suaveness in their speech and then a sudden breach

He knew not what was to come
She knew not that life dint allow her freedom

Many dreams shattered his life all battered
They just moved leaving everything scattered

As though lightning struck and their world destruct
To offer them solitude on a turn that was abrupt

Blanched and dismayed or just a haggard life
He saw himself in an overwhelming strife

Where are the stars, where is the light
How could she leave him alone to fight

He saw her go to never return
She left him there with a heart that burn . . .

Airport tale

2007-11-28T17:36:00.000+05:30

GOsh... apne logan nai sudharte i tell ya! i mean apne hyderabadiz :D

I was at the airport to recieve my brother on friday morning ( yea i was sick and and off since thur till aaj :D, now dont ask me wat iw as duin at d airport then :D, actually, baba gave me a grin early morning and asked me to get up without making much noise so we cud sneak out for breakfast.. lol i dunno wat made him do that, he just said get up lets go.. let these ppl eat at home.. ur home today .. we'll go out :D:D:D:D:D:D heheh.. so the buqaR was off fr a while.. n neway bhia's flite was around same time.. sooo.. )

we were there much earlier than time! i dont remma whn i waited for sm1 sooooo long! huh!... but hey. it was fun :D,

actually na.. iw as at the airport.. after longggg longggggggg longgggggggg! yea.. may b iw as there just once ( dnt remmba wn) after i got bak frm dammam ( yea!!!! 8th std last!!!! cha! ) neways.... dad was tired of standing.. so he saw sm... umm i dunno wat to call it.. he js sat there.. n i moved around.. n man the crowd i tell u!!!!!!

there wer 4 flites scheduled, one frm frankfurt, another frm amsterdam, one frm dubai n the last one frm riyad!, n since it was d last one!! my bro was but obviously cmin frm riyad wali flite! ( aisi hota hamesha, ur waiting for the lasssssst flite.. n wo bhi late aati! dats L!Fe !)

khaiirrrrr ( hey.. afte rlong eh :D) ya.. so.. i was waiting.. n within that time span ( about more than n hr! ) i saw... 'hyderabad in a nutshell'..... here goes! this WILL NOT sound unfamiliar!

A 35+ lady, moving around ( running behind a kid!) with a 'phoolon ka tokra' ... yea!! do i have to tell u y?? ... then she finally stops at one place n yells at another lady... ab inki kahani suno.. shez holding a very little girl, a very cute one too.. whoz crying terribly ( nah.. not like pain or nehtin.. i cud make out.. she was js irritated! n y wudnt she b? she z js toooo small for anyone to smear lipstik on her lips AND CHEEKS!!! n not let her down to move since more than n hour, and js hold her to let her do NOTHING) .. now .. a fello in his early thirties joins this gang and does his regular,, salam ...arre kaise hai ( asks the mom, but pulls the lil girls cheek whoz already pissed off!! ) dont really remmber but this fela refered to one of the ladies as khala or phuppu or chachi.. ... now n old uncle cmz han... hez running behind the same kid this phulon ka tokra wale aunty was running after.... that kid ( about rehan;s age) i tell u.. was very adorable... n u know wat that kid was duin... u know dat luggage carrier they use ... yeaAA!!! he was running around with that thing!! n he finally got tired n sat js rite in frnt of me... n shouted.. dadi ammiiiiii... n then that lady came again... he pulled her n said.. ap baithjaiye mein bhi thak gaya... n she sat..! lol it was sooo cute :).. then... another early 20's guy joined these ppl... he had long hair n wore a monkey cap!! n one of those other aunties yelled " tu abi tak nai kataaya baalan!!! " yuppp i'm js quoting her :D... then the kid yelled again.. chacha kab to bi aate dadi ammi, n i smild at that n that lady saw me smile .. n she took the kid n moved ahead :D

finally... i saw all cartons ( yea yeaaaa wahi!! the kind they all load whn cming frm saudi) in those carriers.. n i was like.. baba... aagai jaisa hai riyad ki flite n passngers tooo nikalre hi.. n there i spotted my brother wid a one too!! .. js smiled n moved out wahan se then....

chalo... ghar jaaing timee...

Allahafiz :)

Work your life your way

2007-11-16T09:35:00.000+05:30

….. nah I don’t mean dat work….
Read dat again… ‘work your life YOUR way’ , n u sure will notice some miniscules u missed out on when you were just ‘working’ throughout life..

Check this out.. n hav a beautiful day http://www.sevenwondersofyourworldmovie.com

eeeeeeeee!

2007-11-15T11:30:00.001+05:30

my build is on.. it'll take time.. so sneaked in here again :D.. hannn to where was i....

weekend done... ya.. monday morning blues were all pinks untill it was eve whn i was totally saturated.. dont ask me of wat!! i spoke to manso n yelled n shreaked bout 'life' man she cudnt stop laughing.. i still wonder wat made u laugh so much dumdum!.. sheesh! hold on, i'll b bak, the build failed :(.. solaris has a problem wid itoa!!! huh!
hold onnn

sheeshhhhh the bo case report! huh! i'll get bak baaaaaaaaaadme bubye!

okk chalo bakk..
ok.. monday eve as iw s returning home, in a bad mood thinkin how wiproz got d nack of messin things up for me by day end,but js as i was rushing, i saw this beauuuuuuuuuuuuuutiful crescent n cudnt stop smiling, i tell u.. He js knowz how to change a bad grin into a smile :) .. khairrrrrrr ( heyy hehe i js got to know wat this khaiiiiiirrrrrrrrrrr means :D lolllz )

newyas.. i wanted to meet a frnd, whn d bus stoppd i thot for a hwile i'll take left n go meet her nt hen get home.. then saw d time.. n niwas like.. nah she wont b home so soon, n it was 7.15 then... yea dats when iw as crossin d road terribly n i was told 'itni jaldi mein nai rehna' bla :D.. khairr.. i headed home.. n as soon as i stepped in.. she called, i js gave a puzzled luk to my fone n was like.. huh i was jsss thinkn of her nai. :D

i'll get bak badme yaroo!

Rewind..

2007-11-15T09:30:00.000+05:30

u know, i realised dat everytime i get a lil lazy n think, na i'll log this later, i see dat i miss ou on so many thingss, i missd puttin stuff bou d luvly carefree weekend i had, n by the end of monday i already had a messy mood so i dint bother to log it, again tue was different it had so much i had to ttell myself.. but i got stuk wid other things.. n i ended up fuming yesterday.. hmm bad idea, .. next time se.. i'll let out every damn thing here, kinda my best place, its soooo tolerant i tell ya :).

weekend.. hmm friday.. diwali hol.. so it was likee.. wooowwwiii.. n since iw as workin since last three saturdays( YESSSS I WASS :(:( ) this one seemed sooooo releiving.. it was liek.. here u go u get three days to live .. n i tuk ;em like.. yiippyyy hehe.. fridya went to aapi's new home.. had a nice time there.. evening we headed to necklace road to , sam bhaiz idea that we cud check out d fireworks.. n i tll u it was luvly.. n the best part was... the place was not one bit crowded.. no traffic nuthinn.. had a nice peaceful drive, a veryyyy nice long barefoot walk in d grass n feast( ni had a terrible throat, sam bhai nai dilate bole ice ream, but u know i can pester ppl o get my things done :D ) neways.. having Rehan aroound is a treat in itself, but the baby had a running nose too.. so he dint get d ice cream :D... i called up anilz n manso n keets n ashwini n shubha wahanse, magar kisiiiiiii ke nums nahi lage, except ashwiniz n i spoke to her.. khiar.. it was gud.. n u know watt.. i also sawwwwww.. Rayees Sir wahan, he helped us wid mouse programming in our 2ns year project, .. i had my spects on, so h wud'nt recgnize me! no way :D, n d bad thing was i cudnt remmber his name that time so i cud go n talk to him.. n it wud be bad if i;d go ask him.. khair. i kept pestering aapi n baji n the otherz k hez my sir but i dont remmber his name.. they ensured we were away frm that place lest i do smthin silly ( nahhhh i wudnt haina :D)... khair.. that was my fridya:)
then.. sat... i lazed around.. cudnt sleep late:( i got up sab se pehle.. dats at 7 coz i had a swollen gum n was in pain :( n i got up rote hue n mum bhi uthgaye.. khair.. nuthin much in d dway.. js lazin around.. n yaaaaa i had a very very very long chat wid af( oh my goddddd! dat remins mee!! ) ya.. so we shared all our old pics reminiscing old days ( meaning engg days) n mal bhai n gang ke pics , n she was surpised hhe.. n man idint realise.. i was wid her for three hours or so !! i dunno wat dat dumdum dz itni rat me online! khair.. cal hai . holddd on..

ya! hehe see.. i hav messy mood.. n it messess up otherzz too :) khairrr.. ya then sat eve, there was htis weddin i had to attend.. kiski malum? :D therz this uncle ( dats wat i cal him) who made d sofa's at our place so i used to study upar in the room n he used to make sooo much noise with his hammers n this n that, n he always used to peep into my rrom n then request me to cm n have a luk at what hez done ( he had htis thing to lisn to .. accha banaye uncle :) lol. ) khair. it was his son;s wedding n he sooooooooo much wanted us to cm! n so i did make my lind lat minute n joined mum n shanna n mycousins were there too ( he made smthin at their place also ) so well it was gud..

sundayyyyyyyyy to dont askk.. i watched jab we met n it was .. grrrrr888888 :)

heyyyy bohot kaam hai :(
i'll get bak about this again.. inshAllah by day end! n maniwonder wat excites naidu so much when girish calls! (ok hez d new onsite fela whoz joining us offshore.. gona b my first encounter, he better not mess wid me :D)

wil get back jaldi se.. have to send prelim package aj kaiiiiiiiiiisa bhi.. n stil havnt chkd my solaris build... windows build works fine.. it was crashing terribly kal to.. aj theek hai :)
chalooooooo
bas khaalllllllllllllas!

russshiiiiinnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn

2007-11-14T17:56:00.000+05:30

i feel like.. there shud have been this huge cupboard where i cud go n hide behind n everyone wud go hunting for Tasneem n neva find her.. although i feel like "muuuummmmmmmmmyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy" i dont feel like goin home, n no! i dont feel like stayin bak at this forsaken place either!, y do i have such lil choice yaaaaaaaaaa!!
mein ek akeli jaan .. n itna sara kaam :(, Tasneem this Tasneem that, Tasneem did u take care of this, Tasneem please take care of that, Tasneem please send a preliminary package! PHUTOOOOOOOOOOOOooo Tasneem aint workin oneeee bit ab!

i;m asked if intersted in a training, then i luk at d dates n go.. ahh no.. have many things scheduled already! damn my calender is full !

i feel like m in this blak n white room with all blak n white baloon n a blak n white teddy bear n ok a blak n white cake n blak choclates wid white wrapper n blaaaa man i sound so overwhelmed by ennnui !! huhhh !!! luk at meeeeeeeee!!

i tell ya.. they say u must njoy at work.. i m soooo damn sure ke pooooore jhoot bolte, sirf bataaaane ke baatan, sabbbb dikhawa, not in this industry atleast, it HAS to be that htey feel as bla as i am now, quite a few timess...

i crossed dat mehdipatnam road terribly few days bak, n i got a comment.. itni jaldi mein bhi nahi rehna( apne logaan kabhi nahi sudharte i tell ya! ) i dunno dats one thing wid wich i feed excitment into my dumb moments fr those microseconds

butttttt heyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

na.. kuch nai chalo bye!
i know i cnt miss it.. n i have to run ab tooo

adiosss

Got it sorted...

2007-11-08T09:22:00.000+05:30

Heyy! i was js readin thru, n i chekcd that ' ihate him' post of mine :D, aaakhri gusse me thi mein naiii.. lol, i kinda laughed js now bout wat i rote obviously in a fit of anger, but gud na, i captured 'em dat moment! :D .. but i dint mention bout the talk i had with him the other day na...

he was very busy on the demo day so i cudnt talk to him coz he was always wid other ppl around, n i dint wana mess things up for him in front of others ( seee m such a gudie!! ) khair... next morning, iw as waitin for him, n surprisingly he was late.... i was still fuming bout the previous day... he walked in n i walked out for a cup of cofee... i got bak n i strait headed to his cabin, n said iw ant to talk to you, he just lukd at me, coz he had js a while ago, come to my desk to chk the status bout where we r, n i cud see dat 'jhalak' of i dunno wat about the previous day;s gud demo... so khair, he dint offer me a seat, so i sat down myself, n i gues dats when he realised .. o oo.. smthinz rong ( coz i dont ever show him the patience to sit n talk to him about anything, m always on the fly with a 1 2 or a yes no or a techie talk wid him) khair... i told him i'm not feeling good since yesterdays demo, he gave me a very suprising luk, i dint wait for him to ask y.. i just shooted out ... i dint like the way you told the client that i was late for a scheduled meeting, that too with such a lame excuse ( i was off for lunch n dint turn up even after half n hour had past the scheduled time! dats d excuse he gave!! ), it seemed to me like you potrayed me as an irresponsible person who dint turn up for a scheduled meeting... and he started offfff, he js cant stand oneeee bit of blame ( m usin d rong word, cant think of anything better dat can fit in.. ) even if its HIS FAULT!, he just kept interrupting me, n then i gave him a very stern " please let me finish before you say anything, i want to let u know that i dint like something you did for no fault of mine, nuthing personal naidu, but i dont think i can work well if this still goes on in my mind".. that was enuf for him i guess, he said ok u say first.. n i continued n told him he cud have given any reason, without putting the blame on me.. bla bla.. all my gussa was out rite on him:D, but hey i did it neatly han, put my point strait n stern with no gunjaaish of confusion, n no ill thought or hard feeling .. ( u know i kinda use this ok, may b u can call it trick;) i always say my watever and then put in smthin like, ur elder to me n much more experianced n i luk up to you for all that, but i did not like what you did yesterday [yea i used those very words:D]) ...

khair... after my part, he obviously shooted off his diplomatic stuff showing me things like cummonnnn... u dont have to take it that way, u know i go in so many meetings, and they themselves, i mean the clients Uffe and Rune ( ya, unlogon ke naama aisich rehte! ) turn up lates, sometimes they turn up after half the meeting is done.. n if its a personal reason smthin like lunch or so.. they dont mind it one bit.. infact it would show us in bad lite if we wud say the data is not ready he said... n he said ya actually., iw as the one who logged in earlier than time, so they thought we woud start off immidiately but niether of you ( me n jaw) were there so they were waiting, but its ok.. nothing like they thought about u as n irresponsible person.. u guyz r duin a gud job.. bla blaa.. thn i js said ok.. i js thought i'd share it wid you coz i dint like it.. may b if u;d be in my place u;d feel the same ( ya i said dat too :D) n he said ya thats rite may b i;d feel smthin like dat, but thats not the whole story rite, i cudnt say our data is not ready, n since i had already said that u both r on lunch i cud continue with that reason...

thne i js got up n walked out.. he also said 'well taken' not sure y he felt dat.. but.. khair.. it was sorted, n i told him i dnt like it , n i put it clear so ms ure he wudnt dare to so nehtin close to dat again :)

Stop!! u cant Go !

2007-11-07T09:56:00.000+05:30

it was all fine but u had to mess it up all for me

things were moving but u had to remind them of we

i jus wasnted to start off with those lines, dont ask me y, n since they had no head n tail i thought i;d put them in d centre ;)....

hey, howzzit like when ur walking and ur pulled over and held onto and although u want to ur not allowed to go... phirti nai? hmm yea, meri bhi..

i'll come bak to this again later..

a moment n ur..... :(

2007-11-06T14:45:00.000+05:30

i dunno, m not felin gud.... i was fine a lil while ago, i was.. well ya.. in the 'rite gud' mood, wid many background things in mind/hert n work in d foreground n.. it was gud.... but now... :( i feel... sad :( and i know y...

i was congratulated wid tonnes of sarcasm about smthin dat dint mean nethin to me, .. i dunno wats wid this... it can not be tht one does not know whats important for them and whats not, it can not be that one can not prioritize things and place them ritely so they all turn out in the best possible way, but yes theirz surely a possibility of improvement in every damn thing, but how cn one look at one;s choice wid the eye of improving it? if u n i luk at the same thing, we still may differ in opinion about many things bout it wudnt we? i mean therz such n open possibility of it isnt there? then?

y do i have to declare this and this is important to me and this and this is not?, if somethings important wont i put in everything to it? n if it dznt turn out wel and another thing dat i dint perhaps give as much importance turns out wel, how dz it seem?.. well ok for someone out of the ring it obviously means lack of effort in the important case ! but dat aint true n i;d know it wudnt i?

khairr.... janedoo..

iw onder if this is understandable

i say something and the other person undrstands,

when i dont say , they dont understand

but sometimes you dont say and they'd still understand

also other times if i dont understand i wud ask, but if i am not explained i still try, if i dont sitll understand, i'd declare that i dont get it, so anything expected of me in that regard will not be fulfilled for the obvious reason that i dint understand... isnt this fair enuf?

ok if i put it the oter way round... u dont undstand what i say, or may i i wudnt say at all, so i obviously wud assume that anything with regards to dat wil not be done coz i dint convey the meesage ritely, or i dint convey it at all..

blaa kya hai ki janedo..

i tell u whn one has n unstable state of mind it cn take u anywher! i realised i forgot my ear ring in d wash room wn i removed it cz it got stuk n hurt me, i askd my frnd if she had it, n she tol me i left it there, iw alked out n gues where i headed to luk for it? duh ! the pantry!! how dumb is dat? then i realised i was at d rong place n then reached the rite one n it was still lying there thankfully....

khair... khairrr khairrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr ( see m usin this so often too :( )

bas... aur kuch nai... but yea.. it takes js a moment or two to squeeze out all the energy frm u n ya i dont have to say that the company u have in those one or two moments is what maters... infact dats the only thing dat matters at all.. hmmmm but it goes well even the other way round, i eman, u js need a moment or two to feel ur happiest best with someone around.... n sometimes its so wierd dat both these diverse moments r a result of one person nai?

janeddoooooooooooooo kya bolrun ki mein..

m droolin ova this one these days :D

2007-11-05T17:33:00.000+05:30

naa hai ye paana naa khona hi hai
tera naa hona jaane kyun hona hi hai

tumse hi din hota hai surmaii shaam aati hai..
tum se hi tum se hi

har ghadi saans aati hai,

aankhon me aankhen teri, baahon mein baahon teri
mera na mujhme kuch raha.. hua kyaa

baaton mein baaton teri, raatein saughaatein meri
kyun tera sab ye hogaya... hua kyaa

mein kahin bhi jaata hua, tum se hi miljata hun..
tum se hi tum se hi

shor me khaamoshi hai, thodi se behoshi hai
tumse hi tumse hi...

aadha sa waada kabhi, aadhe se zyada kabhi
ji chaahe karlun is tarah wafaa ka

chode na choote kabhi, tode na toote kabhi
jo dhaaga tum se jud gaya .. wafaa kaa

mein tera sarmaya hun... jo bhi mein ban paya hun
tumse hi tumse hii..

raste banjaate hain manzilen miljaati hai
tumse hi tum se hi..

na hai ye paana naa khona hai hai
tera naa hona jaane kyun hona hi hai...

courtesy: Jab we met

Maujja hi maujja ;);)

2007-11-05T16:49:00.000+05:30

i have noooo idea y m in sucha mood,i;ve got loooooooooooooooads of work to finish u know... soo much dat .. hehe i dont know what m gona do bout it...... i had such time laughing at the wieeeeeeeerddddd bugs my team discovered, and my team was like... luk at this girl.. shez laughing.. lollz trust me i cud do nuthin but laugh at 'em... they were ... soooo wierd :D:D:D.. aneways.. is till got to fix 'em u see.. n waise i dotn remmber posting dat m done wid requiremnt implementation ;) loll yeaaaaaaa ! i still aint thru wid dat, n i already found other things i still will need to fix... n u know d besttttttttttt part... LOL LOLLLL d damn thing doesnt work in Mozilla at alll !! n u shud see what happens to it in Netscape... hehhe..... n damn I GOT TO FIZ IT ALLLLLLLLLLLLLL .... n i dunno by whn.. :D:D:D:D:D n u know another thing dat happnd.. loll.. i cant stop laughin bout it:D:D:D:D:D, its bout a new fela in my team, who i assigned work to ;););) yeaa!! my manager asked me to assign it to him ;) ;) khair... wo banda na.. aj uthaake onsite walon ko.. he sent thisss thrashing mail.. LOL i cudnt stop laughing... khair.. it was this guyz fault han... i was surprised n elderly guy dznt posses such minimum patience? huh!

khairrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr...... kannan rote a mail whn soud forwarded dat mail to him... sayin,, NAidu call onsite immidiately .. with thte team in CC ! ... :D:D:D:D i replied sayin hez off aaj... ab kal dekhooooooooooooooooo kya hona haiiiiiii.. maza aanewala haiiiiii :D:D:D:D:D

nagada nagaaaada bajaaaaaaaaaa.,,, i dunno wat dat means.. but i tell ya.. its a mmmm yup ! dhinchchchchakkkk is d word for it !! :D:D:D:D

n apart frm all dat i dunno.. m in gud moood aj :):):) u know.. d "special effect" kinddss.. lolll.. hey... namaz time! pushingg off.. ! n there goes my alarm bout d billlssssss.. so i wont frget dropping them down aaj ;):)

nagaaada nagaada nagaaada bajaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

hey 5.30 ko birthday party tooooo ...mmmm n i cant stay back eva aga8in.. coz of d pune wipro episode.. dad gave me SUPER DUPER STRICT instructions bout my aana aand jaana...
chalooooooooooooooooooooooo
bassssss
ab byee :):D:)

okk i feel better..

2007-11-01T18:01:00.000+05:30

no id int talk to him about it.. he dint have the time, he was bz discussin the after offs of the demo, n sicne the feedback was gud he was happy.. neways...

they js got back frm a status meet, n kiran walked staright upto me n gave me a serious look n said... 'do u know what happened in the status meeting today?' he never comes n shares those meeting minutes wid me, but this was like.. i had my headfones on, so i pulled them off, n turned around n gave him that.. " o ooo did they ask us to deliver it tomorrow???? or did we do smthin again" look... n then he smiled n said , they are very very happy with today;s demo and said that after last time;s demo they thought that we cant reach very far and that we may have postone th release to a very far date, they dint see solutions being taken into use untill far future, but it seems after aj ka demo they see it happen very near in future... n he (Kiran) ended by saying, congratulations, its urs n jawahar's hardwork... i replied wid a smile.. n usi time pe naidu was also there.. but no !! he dint walk up to me to say anything similar... see! dats the kinds fela he is !!
umm ok.. but he did say thank you to me n jawahar durin the demo fr workin well over the week.. blaaaaaaaaaaa
he stil is bad! n hez rite behind me rite now! i stilll care a damn! coz i dont like him for a million reasons :(

leaving fr d day, baba is gona b bak frm d farm today... so cant b late aj..adios..

i hate him!

2007-11-01T15:38:00.000+05:30

i always always always did !! sometimes i had strong enuf reasons, sometimes i js cudnt help it and sometimes i cudnt find a reason not to hate him and so i always hated him! this time again!! i aheva reason! he doesnt have the minimumm ettiquets to be a manager!! ( ok may b m sayin this in the heat of the moment! but rite now! i really feel dat way ! )

i was 5 minutes late for the demo, agree d fault was mine, not htat i ditn plan the whole thing or anything, but ok i will take the blame for those 5 minutes! it was scheduled at two n iw as here at dot 2.5 and he dint call the client yet, obviously he cudnt without me ! I askd jawahar if the library is ready, he said NO!! now there!!!!! i told him about it at 11 o clok and he said he;d make it !, n iw as suppose to deploy it, my set up was IN PLACE i js had to mail him the url, and i did dat at 2.5 dot ! but that library was one definite thing they;d ask for a show ! and jaw had to do it ! he frgot or what i dont know... but it wasnt there and so we both started making it that time, it wud take 8 to 10 minutes, n naidu was watchin all this.. i knew we wudnt have the library in time so i immidiately did a rebuild with a different configuration and had another url set up... by then naidu called them up, and u know what he tells the client??? he told them that we need a little more time coz Tasneem is a bit late and is not back from lunch yet !! huhh!!! when i was rite rite in fron of his damn eyes and he saw me help d other guys wid d library!! what gud is dat?? how low can he get down? hez a manager n well this is how he manages a situation? at the cost of anotherz reputaiton?.. id otn care what !! but hell if i luk at it out f the ring!! that man!!! potrayed me as an irresponsible person who wasnt on time for a scheduled meeeting !! and we apparently started the demo at 2.30 and he mutes the call and tells me, say Hi and then start of ! HUH ! and the worst thing is that he doesnt think what he did is rong!

i aint gona let himm of so easily ! he has to answer me on that !

i hate him and now i know y !!

well but the end result of the demo was gud.. coz... well they liked it.. i mean the client was satisfied with the demo, and mentioned "good" quite a few times, and we also got n appreciation mail from the onsite co ordinator that we put up a gud show ... ( and this is the biggest surprise, coz me and jawahar.. the developers werent very ssatisfied with tht outcome) they were impressed by the images i designed.... the last moment work i did by staying back for n hour yesterdya... yea.. dat paid off... they luvd dat bit of work dat i did.. !

but i still hate himm !!

u know... the deewane pane ki baarish kindsss ;);)

2007-11-01T08:49:00.000+05:30

Most of my team mates stayed back for work yesterday, not that THAT was my reason to stay back, i had my dumb work to finish n for a change it was movign well n cud hav been done for a gud show this morning (i;ve got jus one tiny bit pending n i'll fix dat after this.. ).. neways... i tuk the 7 shuttle, n was at mehdipatnam around... 7.45 or so... the bus stopd n i stepped down, n guess what??? i dont see my foot!!!!!!! it was totally immersed in dat ganda paani... wel okk.. i mean.. it was raining sooooooooooo heavily, u know the kinda rain they call " its raining cats n dogs" ( i dunno where i heard dat.. sounds dumb naii? ! ) khair... kyaaaaaaaa baaarishhh, kyaaaaa baarishh.. kyaaaa baarishhhhhh.. it wasss awesome :):):)... i js stepped down n within less than a minute my burqa was dripping, n ya the lower half was aneways soaked!!! n i cudnt stop smiling in that condition! :) i dnt remmber whn i bheegofied like dat.. it was :):):):):):):) yeaaa dat kind.... i have this vagueee memory of similar rains, wayyy bak in coll days, i guess it was first year, saf anways hates rain, but.. far wasnt sportive enuf either dat day.. n i remmber juvi n ash n af were there too.. hmmm aisi kuch kuch tha shayad, wo.. parking wale shed ke pas we stood for a while to let the rain sober down :D

khair.. kal i dint hava choice.. not dat i;d choose otherwise if i;d b given any :D:D:D:D, i walked to get n auto which i was sure iw udnt get! ( the damn auto strike!) .. blaaa.. khair.. mazaa aagya kal to bheegke, i had js one fear, agar koi manhole khula hota! :D:D:D:D:D:D hehehehe.. u get it dont ya ;);) so iw as bein jssss a lil careful... i finally got na uto.. jo thodi door chalke kharab hogya, so again i had no means to reach home, but dat fella was gud enuf to ask me to hold on fr a hwile n started his auto but bad mannn! he dint take me till my home! he stopped at the lane saying therz tooo much water in there ! ( waise han tha to sahi.. FIR BHI!!!!) iw alked home wahan se.. wid directions from my cousin who was peeping out of her home untill i reached mine safely.... cz i cud hardly see anything.. except lottttttttttttttttts of water :D

magar baaarish to khoob thi :) maza aagya, n u know i had the radio on dat time.. n guess what number was playin? haha! one of my favs! ... 'in dinon' from the movie metro :D, i cudnt stop smiling.. ofcourse at the risk of seeming foolish to the rest of the world who must have thought " deewane pane ki barish + no auto+ flooded roads + no way to reach home + alone + smiling wo bhi akele!" hehehe dumb nai...

chalo, have another demo scheduled at 2 ! ...

published on 30th, frgot yest :D

2007-10-29T16:14:00.000+05:30

ye dilllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll

i dunno whats wid d mood, not one bit of work m hatin it.. i mean work.. n luvin this.. i mean the music n the no no noooooo work at all thing, i've got so many msngr windows on , n they go blink blink blink :D

u know i;ve got this reaaaaalyyyyyyyyyyy dhinchakk kinda list playing!! the typical bollywood stuf wid lotsssssssssa beats n boom n ping n pong n ting n tong n wateva else, u know.. the beedi jalaile, vaari vaari, dus bahane, its rocking, khal bali, rubaruu... yeaaaaaaa those kinda tracks, n :D i like it for a change!! its on full vol, i put it aside so the others cud lisn to sm of it too but thn i put them on again... wnt it js fr myslef!

so its no work mood n hell wid d demo i dunno wats gona happn wid it.. i dnt realy care anymore either.. soo.. letss.. ccc noww :):)

geee its tauba tauba ufff ;) playin noww..

n m offffffffffffffffffffffff

:D

2007-10-28T19:49:00.000+05:30

lol.. i got this checked at sm blog ratingsite i encountered at another blog

Am I or am I not..

2007-10-25T12:54:00.000+05:30

Its such a wierd thought
what am i trying to sought
it lies there in front of me
but i wish to see it not

will someone wake me up
tell me its a dream
i promise not to sleep
if you just temme this is a dream

can this be true although i wish it were not
but it tells me, its over n i have lost
not that it was mine not that i tried
but i still feel the loss, a thought that seem to have died

therez agony on the other side
that anguish is perhaps more than my tide
can i wish for it to subside
with a hope that this wish He wouldnt override

He's havin fun at the cost of my day??

2007-10-24T09:34:00.000+05:30

It feels like its yucky day season goin on !

a pathetic day start ! sheesh its like things are waiting at every corner to just topple down as soon as they see me pass byyy... mmmmmmmmmmmuuuuuuuuuuuummmmmmmmmmmmmyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

it wasnt oneeee bit of my fault! i got up on time, got dressed on time, had breakfast on time, n was ouuta home ON TIME!

ab kya hua malum?? damn damn damn!! i dunno watss wid these damn auto guyz! they dont lisn when u ask them to put d meter on, they js want to dump in as many people as possible n take them to a common destiantion! i hate them! nuthing effects them! even a very gud offer to take a customer ALONE to their desired destination does not lure them! i dunno wats gone into them!!!

sooooo the outcome??? huh! i missed my bus, it was 8 a;ready n i wasnt at my stop! how long wud the bus uncle wait! then i thought.. ok... ive missd it i know... i'll take the rtc bus ( man i hate itttt!! ) but it was n ok alternative! better dan the sevn seaters, i dunno m allergic to 'em cn neva eva eva eva travel in dat ! neways.. hold on.. my build is done!

bla it dint go well.. did it again... neva mindd...

yea so where was i ! ab dekho.. since i decided i'd take d bus... wo bus aana na??? the damnnn thing!!!!!! it dint turn up in a whole 40 minutes i was standing there!! can u imagine! a bus dat has a frequesncy of less than 15 minutes in that area, dint turn up in a whole 40 minutes!!! n that that thattttt had to happen the samn day i wudnt get n auto n hence miss my bus!! huhhh!! all thisss for nooooooooo damn fault o mineeeeee !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

neva mind yaa.. i aint in d mood to rethink the incident n put it here, whn i;ve done it almost.. but wateva... as i was typin all this, i saw things go worse.. guess what i did to add on to my frustration? huh... hit the main switch wid my leg ( by mistake as usual !! i dunno y they hav d power suplly down there! ) n then i had to restart n bla n bla n bla..

although i started ritin this in d mornin.. i havnt published it by..w ell... noon !? huh.. yea.... n my mood is kinda the same.. well ok a lil better.. i bought myself a fruit n nut to calm myself down.. n i;m gona have it all alone! not a cube to any one!!

will get bak to wrk now! n knowwww wat???? got a mil frm d manager wid instructions dat read ( in his silly english! ) dat therz too much chatting and browsing goin on in d team and dats pulling down th productivity level ! yea yea yea rrrrrritE! dats y i tell him to distribute work! bla ok.. neva mind.. dat wasnt for me... how i wish it was :(

but u know.. this day really gave me dat feeling of being mocked at!... by whom? Him ! it seemed like, Hez sittin up there, n playin around wid my day, js to tease me ! :-X u know.. like u irritate a baby n then wn hez almost cryin, u hug him to comfort him n u certainly feel gud bouti t... yeaaaa dats exacttttly what i feel He is doin wid me todayyy !!!

khairr khairrrrr... my chocs waiting....

ciao!!

wind n storm n tornadoes or anything more worse?

2007-10-19T13:05:00.000+05:30

how difficult can it be to describe a heart storm that occurs in the middle of a brain storm? n to worsen it, we see that these two storms are contained in another humungous storrm... waht more? you know these lil storms inside the big one, are already tellin me... hey Tasneem , this is jus the beginning, we gotto go a long long way !!

huh!

i dunnooooooooooo

2007-10-10T15:55:00.001+05:30

I logged into messenger, totally frustrated hating Ericsson (earlier i hated just Wipro, now i know Ericsson is the major culprit) muuuuuummmmmmmmyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy,
i've got this terrible cold ( yea coz of the ice cream i ate from Zainab , Baqar and Rehan... "such chote chote kids n itna bada ice cream each" i thot, n so made some stupid sad faces to blackmail them n they all stood in a line taking turns to give me bites and licks of the ice cream :D) n ab dekhooooo, galaa is totallllyy off d mark ! i;ve got a reddd nose now! sniff n sneeze man!!! naidu mst have heard my sneezes sooo many times since morning, but i still know that manager of mineee... uurrghhhh neva mindd..

han to khairr.... d damn point wass... dat m here coz m sickkkk of work, aint it wierd, m sick of work everyday n i still cm back n do it ! huh !!! smthinz terribly rong wid me... but u know one gud thing... i finally figured out how to add that SL parameter and where to add it :) i;m soo relieved it !! but i still ahd sm questions n so mailed Soud, then also checked wid Kiran, so now have a better insight of it..

hmmm Anil was tellin me... your much better than us Tasneem, the important thing isss.. you have work ! n i gave him dat duh luk wid that dumb smiley n said, Anilz, peace is whats most important.. n i see my self heading towards n edge that lacks itt... ( how thoughtful? huh Applying thought!! yeaaa rrrrite! gimme a breakk ! )

mmmmmm my right shoulder is in pain, coz of the mouse effect i guess... sheesh i'll go nuts if i stay longer in this industry :(

Hey... u know what i;ve thot of.... i aneways have plans to learn Arabic, the Quran and Sunnah and the Fiqh... mmmmmm when else m i gonna start?

kya hai ki yaarooo.. beekaaaaaaaar ka dimaag kharab hai yaan! bohottt phirti meri aise situations me !

Butttt.. hey Eid is smthin i cn luk fwd to :) :)

okkk Gayatri wants me offfff the sys now!

so ciao !!

Melancholy

2007-10-09T11:37:00.000+05:30

Today again i heard a cry
a bruised heart's moan
a heavy sad sigh....

There's wind and rain
and buds in pain
A smile that's faint
and beauty stained

A tear that rolled
down the cheek
just that one
could a million words speak

In the darkness of the nite
there was a plea for light
Alas! in vain
'coz none cared his plite..

Mansooooooo, these r fr u !

2007-10-09T11:28:00.000+05:30

Aap se hai mohabbat aapse hi hai inkaar
Aap se hai gila bhi aapse hi hai takraar

Dil chaahe bhi milna dur rehna bhi chaahe
Hain baatein kuch kehna kuch sunna bhi chaahe

Hai kaisi ye kaifiyath kuch samajhna na chaahe
Jo dil mein hain baatein zubaan par laana na chaahe

Suna hai isi ko kehte hain mohabbat
Hai kaisi ye ulfat ke iqraar karna na chaahe

_________________________________________________

Falak pe chand taaron ki baaraat saji hai
Chehre pe unke aisi hi kuch muskaan saji hai

Naa jaane kya sukoon hai unke intezaar me
Mit si jaati hai har thakaan unke deedaar se

Naayaab si lagti hai zindagi unke saath se
Aabaad hai hamari dunya unki ek haan se

Ummmmmm

2007-10-09T11:13:00.000+05:30

OkKkKkKk!!!
i havent really gone much ahead from where i was last time u know... its been such a crawling journey n NO i dnt really like it that much.... but well.. i remmber saying similar stuff when i was redesigning the eniter toolbar of ALEX and smhow, i was through it.. n mmmmmm ok ok ... it ended well n dats all i want this time too...

khair, kuch hua, i hope aur kuch hojayee...
Eidddddddd :) n u know wat? i asked my manager fr leaves( i dnt belive i ws asking for something that was already mine!!!! huh dat aint Tasneem!!! ) neways... n like usual he gave me his billability crap and said, Tasneem three days is just not possbile, i told him of the Soultion's status ( well atleast now he has n idea dat m havein a bad time! but hell he still emphasizes on just one damn thing n dats it shud b done on time! as ifff.. ahhh nevaa minnddd) yea so khair he said no, but i still walked out sayin myself, i aint cmin fr three days n wateva he says i'll say ya i;ll try to b bak soon but i aneways m gona take three days o my leave! ab wo kaunse din lena hai, wo i gotto plann....

hmmm sholapur jaare mum baba log to get bhabi and the babyyyyy :):) Omar, and heyy! by the time i reached home yesterda, bhabi( d other one) and Fouad( yea dats his name;s spellin n i thot it was Fawad) was already home.. and i tell ya MashAllah, hez such a :):):):):D:D:D:D:D:):):):).. okk.. u get d point dont ya ;)

khair... to apart frm dat.. well ya i wana join mum n dad n fam to sholapur.. ir eally reallyy realllyyy need a change and a breakk!!

mmmm chalo dats bout it... n hey manso dear.. this post is a dedication to u :), not dat i hav any gudy content worth of dedication, but since u told me u kept chkin n dint find updates :) thanxx fr keepin trak of me yaa :).. makes me feel gud dat ur bothered :)

Adioss!!

(: Another babyyyy :)

2007-10-05T11:22:00.003+05:30

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaannnnnnnnnnnnddddddddddddddddddddddddddd we'r gona calll himmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

Fawad
:)

kitneeee din hogayee naaaaa !!!

2007-10-05T08:58:00.000+05:30

u knoww what??? its beennn.. hooooooooooooooooooooooo soooooooooooo long since i posted ! dont ask me wats goin on, but therz like.. so much happening and lots goin on, n well smtimes it feels like.. nah it aint much for a mention n smtimes i go like.. OH MY GOD!! m i gona remmber dat this happnd or do i need to blog it ;)
newayss... hav loads f work to do, n its in pathetic condition! n i really mean pathetic!!! i dunno whats gona wid Solutions! m heading NOWHERE wid it, n like alwayss.. i feel.. naidu cares a damn, so now again, for a whole week i gues i;ve had almost a similar attittude, but noww its really pissing me off, quality god damn!! i dont know y i;m such a .. urrrrgghhhh neva mind!!

yesterday, or may be hmmm two days since yesterday were like sooo .. sooo... i dunno what, i was at my all time low, for.. well GOd knows reasons.. n man was it bad, i screwed up many things... but then yesterday evening.. :) it was nice, i felt so much better, dont ask me y, i aint tellin ya! :D ;) :D
but ya, those bad bad bad n sad sad sad n low low low times, were ...ummm.. not gud ! n it was perhaps also the first time when my bestest buddies were also feelin similar lows ( this was like such a hysterical coincidence). i got a mail from asma askin me to call.. when i did, she heard my terrible 'hello' n went like, whats with you, i said kuch nai u say.. n looooooo... first time i guess, i cudnt really comfort her as well as i alwayss do. We spoke for about 40 minutes or so... then another 20 minutes later, i get a call from Fariya, she asks me to call back... i called.. n ahhhh what a sad tone i hear from the other end, i went like.. whats wid d day aj !! ... she was missing her father.. but again, i dint comfort her as well as i always do, so she was kinda worried coz it was the usual, she;d probably hang up pnly when se was satisfied n feeling better after talkin to me, but dat day.,,, smthin was kinda missin so... well nxt day she called up again to ask me what went rong, n nah i dint have n answer, we realised dat it was such a stupid talk we had that lasted bout n hour, n man it must have sounded sooooooo depressing, coz fr d first time, both of us.. were feeling not so gud (its neva like dat, its usually one of us or none of us ).

n hey, yesterday morning was such a wierdoo too, i got up a lil late n missd my bus, tuk d rtc one, n then got stuck in traffic at toli chowki (it was soooooooo bad kal ! coz f n accident f a sweeper who died on the spot after being hit by the driver of the DPS school bus ) khair i finally reached work at 10.30!!

khair chalo yaro, thoda kaam karlinge... horaich nai merse :(

yallaaaaaa m off now!
Adioss!!!
wooooooooooooooooooo i frgot to mention, we have a new member in our family now, Sajid bhia wants to call him Omar, baba had said Osman, abhi tak to we r calling him OSman, but chalo if bhia insists, we'll call him Omar. n ya, today inshAllah, we are gona have one more lil one joining our family :) I dunno what Sadeq bhia wants to call him, but i luv this name Bilal (if its a boy ! ) n i realllyyyy wanted to call someone Alisha (its such a beautiful name, it means protected by Allah) so i hope its a girl :D:D, but m not sure if baba wud agree to dat :(

khairrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr chalo bye!

* ting ting ti ting *

2007-09-20T12:55:00.000+05:30

geee... i dinno i;d b able to do dat so soon :D:D
thank god fr d damn reusability concept we have!! n my silly eyes dat cudnt see dat dumb funciton lying ind at corner! n i was tryin to rewrite it n i messed up wid memory allocation n mannn were there blunders!! i hate handling those memory blocks, u got to free them u gotto clean them u got to b careful with them.. n i dont like being careful while handling stuff!! eee!

nonetheless.. alls well dat ends well.. n my saga of retrieving the refernce file ended pretty well... n yippy m glad, now i cn move ahead n mess with d url n build it better to serve my purpose:D:D:D

n offffffffffff fr namaz!

(: Maassalaama!! :)

jus another, among the plenty...

2007-09-20T08:38:00.000+05:30

Havent been here since quite smtime i guess.... not really sure wats keepin me off it but.. umm well... hmmmmmm.... m in a dark cubicle with just my monitor's lite flashing on my face... nahh i aint wrkin in the nite.. its morning 8.48am and i js dint put d lites on after cmin in... dint feel like it.. n the other lady who alked along wid me dint feel like it either.. so its.. well.. dark !... n sinct it aint sunny n since it cloudy n since the clouds are grey n since it seems like its gona rain cats n dogs ( nah not literally! hehe imagine! wat a scenee!! :D:D) well so.. coz of all those "since's" the huge window dat i face isnt serving d purpose of enlightning my space either... huh! i tend to put in any damn crap that moves in my mind !well ok.. it aint crap han! blaaaaaaaaaaa

m alll into cpi fr solutionss.. soud is movin to finland this sat, so m wrkin on it alone, n i have no idea how its gona turn out.... jawahar wud be joinin me soon , naidu said dat to me yesterday. Atleast he was gud enuf to inform me that the omnidaemon requirement in thru wid although i was wonderign howcm i aint in the loop f those mail convo;s, neva mind.. may b it wud anyway divert my attention n dats one thing i can not afford to do with cpi fr solutions in my hands... khair.. Ramadan movin well.. :) m havin a nice time, not compromising( or may b i shud say not bein lazy) with my obligatory and my extra prayers n my recitals n etc. n etc. Me safa n Rahmath wait in ofice fr iftar n get home by the 7.15 shuttle, ya i reach home by 8.15 or so.. but.. umm its ok.. since i dint like d idea of bein alone in my bus durin iftar time.. so its ok.. n as long as baba isnt here, i wont have probs, ya whn hez back he aitn gona allow me i guess..

ohhh!!! Lites on... ok.. meaning Naiduz here... hmmmmmm... khair chalo.. i dnt have much to put on.. i got to get back to solutions.. m trying to extract that refrnce file frm d library buttttt. hmmm.. lets c.. i hope i do dat aj, it;ll b n imp steo ahead.

off for d day!
Adioss!!

howz this monday sooo beautifull??!!??

2007-09-17T10:47:00.000+05:30

Its sucha beautiful rainy morning.. :) although last nite i was a lil umm dunno watt... d morning shooted off so welll.. i dunno why.. but it smhow did.. whn things were falling apart suddenly i saw all of them fly back in placce jssssss at d rite time :):)
i frgot smthin home so ran bak to get it.. n so was late, dint get n auto on time, n when i did.. ir elised i dint have enuf chnage to give him n nither did he.. but d guy turned out to b n old fella whod take baji to her clinic earlier, so he tuk wateva i gave him :) .. n js then i missd d bus n this unlce standing htere told me.. ur bus has gone already.. n iw ent .. damnnnn.. bt again.. jsssss thn i saw another bus cmin my way n stoped fr me :):)
hmmmm .. i think i like it :):).. n.. mmm well.. m smilin :):):D:D:):)

nah cant sum it up here..
adioss!!

A quick morning meet !

2007-09-10T10:00:00.000+05:30

I'm just back after a discussion with Naidu, this was kinda a part of the appraisal cycle, so he must "discuss" before he closes my appraisal, n this was for it... waise its his bday aj, n i dint wana wish him, coz i always thought .. umm n i still think i do.. dat he dznt care, he neva wished any of the team mmbers xcept sesi on their bday... so i hd thot i wudn. waise to team se wishes jaate hi.. but khair,, i know its unlike Tasneem, but.. .. ahh neva mind... he came to my desk ( i dunno ajkal he walks up to me quite often i feel ! eeks! ) n i turned n surprisingly "Happy Birthday" nikalgaya mere moo se... wo bhi with a smile... khair he he gave a pleasant thank you (surprisingly !! ) n then said ur appraisal is still pending we'll close it? ( he meant... without d discussion) n i was like... ya sure we can close it, but i have sm questions, n he lukd at me.. n he said ya we'll talk.. n he still stood there!1 ( shudnt he be d one to offer to talk? n then we proceed?! duh !) neways, i said.. so can we talk now? then he gave me dat luk n said ya sure , n he tuk me he cabin n there he started offf....

I started off by askin a general... what is expected out of me.. he gave me a surprising " u are doing gud Tasneem.. when compared to others ur good i can say, but yes since u have just started therez a lot u have to learn..." . Then he said this.. out of all our team members, i think u wud b the only one i wud suggest for the technical stream ( dat did give me ahigh , although i wasnt very sure what xaclt he meant by technical stream, as he differentiated it frm d project stream) on dat he elaborated, u have gud grasping power so u can learn well and go ahead. ( isnt all this sooooooo much cliche'd na?) khair... it went on.... but smhow.. ( may b cz of d general dislike i have towards him, na not a general dislike, sab usi ki karni ka phal hai ! ) i dnt realy have a gud impression bout him ( yea u read dat sentence rite, i am tlaking bout his impression on me and not the vice versa! ) but hten he was being gud to me... he was strongly recommending .NET n hez gona send me for a training too... hmmm ... but thn i kinda was averse towards it, so i told him dat.. well i know it might sound kiddish but i havent heard much gud bot this technology n growth in it, although its smthing dats really flourishing now, n he said well dats a debatable topic, but since ur going to learn the basics, i strongly recommenc you do dat he said.
then another thing he seemd keen on tellin me is dat.. since he thought i was gud at learning he wanted me to get into the architectural side, n not stall my growth. but ya one thing when he said he dint want me to get into the project stream ( not very sure but he used wrds like managing ppl etc. .. n HEY I LIKE DAT!!!) n dats y he "strongly recommended" me for technical stream ( I FIND DAT BORING!!! ).

well as he went on with all dat, i had js one hting in mind, i need two hrs a week for my arabic classes at the university!! n bang i opened my mouth for it. I said this isnt anything technical, u can call it a hobby that i always wanted to pursue. So i glittered it with sayin i always had interest in learning languages ( utnaaaa scene nai hai ;) ) n so i enrolled for this course with the Osmania University for a diploma in Modern Arabic n dat i want to leave at 4 at any one day a week so i can reach th university and attend the classes there. n i told him i had this long term goal of doing my MA in arabic ( ya dis is true, coz i always wanted to learn Arabic as a language, since i already knew how to read n write it, i wanted to learn to understand it if i;d read it.) n at first he shooted to me the billability crap.. n dat i have to show hours being put in so i can bill the client but if everyone takes leaves how cn i show them bla ye bla wo, thn i went on n said i just want two hours a week, coz i m totally tied up, if i just attend one class a week, i;ll smhow manage n do with this diploma xams ( its SDMA; senior diploma in Modern Arabic n dat'll make me eligible for MA in arabic later) so he said ya sure if dats d case, just two hours i think its fine! n yippy! i thoutgh chalta atleast itni baat to maana meri. ( i dunno he is gud to me [hez even given me dat award!!] but.. i still.. ahh dnt like him very much for his earlier nuisances)

hmm so dats wt d discussion was all about.. now o gotto get goin again wid cpi for solutions. I was trying to make my resume the other day, n man did i have a tough time on it!! i sure m gona explore into other things, but.. hmmmm letssss cc noww..

chalo m off here.. may b wil b bak.. but untill then.... its..

bye bye frm Me!! :)

Rewards and Recognition

2007-09-07T17:45:00.000+05:30

Status meetings are boring to the core ! all one would wana to is.. yawnnnnnnnn..

n okie dokie day, a fruitful one though, something i wasn longing to fall in place, finally fell in its place!! n i was informed i;d get an appreciation token, n award that they call the FIMC- Feather In My Cap. well ok dat gave me a lil high, but nah it aint much more than a certificate ( NO, it aboslutely does;nt imply a hike! ) but still, glad to have got it, since it adds on to dat record i;ve been carrying since college n school, here goes, my first ever performance appreciation at Wipro Technologies. :) .. hmm dat sounds nice now. :)

Objective :On-the-Spot recognition important to the project / project team (spontaneous boss-to-subordinate) Eligibilty : Anyone who has done great short-term work.
Criteria : Impact has to be significant and project / account related.
Demonstrates skills such as problem solving, initative, technical competence, implementation of ideas, conception and institutionalisation of project best practices, etc

adioss!! weekend ahead ;)

A Moan..

2007-09-07T17:31:00.000+05:30

Was the fault all mine
All I did was did not lie
Still I did see a tear shine
All I did was refuse to fly

Just a word of dislike
Another to avoid my heart strike
Then how did it hit so hard
Why, why does it feel so sad?

It can’t b that I’m so bad
Just a greeting can’t make one mad
How can my presence be so disliked
That one might wish to turn blind

Wonders are not what i expect
Reality has always been my percept
Then y does it seem to fall like this
There is something I know that is amiss

sOoOoOo much

2007-09-06T15:04:00.000+05:30

Ok now.. another wierd thing.. but before that... i'd like to vent out yesterday;s nuisance! i dunnoo yyyyyyyyy i get soo damn frustu (dats a cute nick fr frustrated, a frnd f mine uses it :D) n sick n sad n bad n angry by the fact dat once in a blue moon i;d have to wait for n hour n do a lil more work ! now as m stil ritin this. m hating d fact dat i have to, or i;d say "had to" instead.! y do they have to arrange meetings at the time whn they kknow m gona leaVE!!! n to add to dat!!! they decide in it, that they;d want a binary to test just then since it wud take just a lil time ( yea riteee!!!!) n smhow i guess it all shows on my face, n so my manager luvs to walk up to me to say, Tasneem if u need any help hez there (pointin at another guy whoz more than used to staying back later than 8 coz he doesnt have to get bak to wat is called home!!) n then that fela cmz n asks Tasneem do u need help, i js luk at him n say. no just a lil i think i'll manage, n m sure he cn read all my extra grins in dat ! n at the rite time! i dunno how! i get this frndz call n he knowz well dat m pissd off coz i have to stay bak n hour, n i politely ask if i cn talk another time ! n he gets it! .. n all dat to pile up on my frustu thing... neywas.. so i wrap it up n head to my shuttle at 7 n reach home... oh no.. not home yet! i hire n auto n there a new idiotic saga with a autowala whoz a crook !
i said Asifnagar PS ke paas chalna hai, he asked ye jo peeche hai? I said yes ( n iwas wondeirng peeche???? huh, was at mehdipatnam n iw as askin fr the asifnagar p.s.. now how;d dat cm peeche? huh! )
neways, he then said... theek hai.. Rs. 20, i thot damn.. its the auto guyz day, ditn negotiate on dat since iw as already irritated by the frust day i had.. so js hopped in .. n there.. he brot me rite in frnt of d P.S n stopped it there! i asked him to take left, damn the guy refused! huh! iw as being polite, n he said yahan aaye tak 30 hojata! silly dumbo! he thought he cud get away with that! i had to say smthin now.. i told him i cm this way EVERYDAY! he still wudnt lisn, i said i wont pay him i get down here, he said he wudnt let me then ! i said fine!! take me back to where we started.. you put ur damn meter on n then v'll take d same damn route, n if its lesser than 20, i aint gona pay u a penny.. n if its more than 25 like u claim, i'll pay u double d amount! ... n guess wat.. dat crook fell for it! he turned d auto ( i cudnt believe he did it! ) n he tuk me well quite ahead, n then he realised.. ab ye waapas jaane ke paise kaun dete,,, although i wanted to burst out laughin.. i was still angry .. n i dint like dat guy oneeeeeeeeeee bit ! but then i insisted he turn the auto dat very minute n he take me home riteeee to my home! n not jst d ps. n i told him he shud now his basic duties as n auto guy ( well i dint use dat word duty thankfully, its ounds silly as i write it though) but he stil wdunt lisn, smhow this time it slippd off my mind, i cud have jst asked him to take me into the police station instead n then he wudnt utter a word n may be take me straight home!
neways after all dat he tuk me home! n i gave him js what i said i wud n went inside.

pheww.. n then i realised i;ve been behaving like a totally frustrated freak whoz got NO life, then i tried to calm myself down,, rushed downstairs n was much better wid my family around. I had to refuse to the Mc donaldps treat i promised my sisterz cz i got late n was home by 8 instead of my usual 7. :( neways, may b today... hmm lets c

ya so i fianlly decided this mornin dat i am gona behave myself n be a btter Tasneem n dat a frustrated Tasneem is realy realy realy bad n dat, this wasnt d real me until last year, so y now.. to aj se.. hum sudhar gaye :)
ok now the next wierd thing...
how strange is this now???
Hez gona celebrate her birthday , hez got cake ordered specially for the occasion, with certain particulars bout th flavour! N has ordered it bout a month in advance, n is gona have it on that day, get it to HIS home n cut it n eat it HIMSELF n she aint gona know! Wat do u call dat now?!!! Huhhhh ! paagal logon ki dunya nai bolte isku????

okk.. m off it now... n yea m anyway gona get half or atleast one fourth of dat cake ( it was described as a whole choclate cake .. n man imran gave me too many yummy details of it.. ) all i got to do .. is wait. :)

n ya.. i still havent done anything bout dat Arabic course i supposedly joined.. I gotto go meet up the HOD n have a plan set. I was so eager on it, now i cant loose it just like dat! .. mmmmm.. lets ccccc noww....

blaa janedo... m still waiting fr a call or mail response so i cn get wrkinnnn, i dont like moving on directionless! nahh not when its software!!!! but ya, my life;s kinda like dat nai?
hey Far ka missd call.. wil cal her now.. so .. signingg offfffff

Maassalaama!

* silly nothings brighten ur day smtimes *

2007-09-04T14:21:00.000+05:30

:D well i've done this really dumb thing abhi kuch time pehle... but.. umm well.. :D it was important fr me dat time :D
i cudnt finish my lunch.. it was too much n i was already full.. n i asked safa to help, n she did untill there was just one more spoon left, but after dat she refused, n i stil cudnt take dat one last bite, n suddenly.. :D keets appeared :D n i kinda, well blackmailed/forced/tortured here to eat it :) n she did after a whole 10 minutes of behez n no n i had to hold her hand so she wudnt get away, fr sooo long! i offered her a choclate fijnally n she still dint agree, n then i maskafied a lil more n bingo ! she had it ! :) . n then i bought her a choclate n now i have a very silly but sweet memory to reminisce later :)

An year ahead...

2007-09-04T10:11:00.000+05:30

Some of 'Me' is really happy, some of 'Me' is astonished and surprised and most of 'Me' is still wondering.. " ek pooora saaal hogaya??? "
Wooooo, how on earth did i do that??? :)

yup its been a whole year in Wipro Technologies today. I stepped into the Madhapur office, with a thumping heart and nervous mind, thinking howzit all gona be from today. When i was about to leave home on this very day, as i stepped ouuta the gate, Baba called from behind and said, from today your walking out to earn your bread, thank the Lord and recite ayat al kursi for a special purpose before ou leave every day. That gave me goose bumps then !! I followed dat( frgot smtimes too , but wud remmber it most of d times :D). n today i realise, its been a whole year.
I;ve had my share of ups n downs, i can;t forget the times i lied in mummaz lap with a tear or two rolling down n telling her, i dont wanna go tomorro mummy, it sure was kiddish, but i dint like the "hectic" work i;d say. There were times i cribbed for having to stay late once or twice, i so hated it ! but i'd console myself sayin atleast i dont have to do it everyday like sm of my other friends. There have been times i;ve luvd the breeze here, the beautiful rainbows i;ve got to see, my silly frineds around, Safa;s company for lunch n smtimes breakfast too. Our cribbin durin morning cofee, my non stop nonsense with my "namaaz ki toli". Its wierd i was liked bby so many. They all were there, n i;ve seen happy times here too. i used to say. the best part f cmin to work is to know dat you gotto get back home. :) although dat feelin aint as strong as earlier now, but i still cherish those thoughts those walks those talks those musings.

Well Wipro taught me how to make cocktail :D Wipro showed me quite a few rainbows. Wipro gave me my first ever cubicle. Wipro gave me this tag i smhow feel proud to wear. Wipro gave me my first ever feeling of being a Software engineer. :) So what if its shown me a Naidu, n sm late days at work, it also showed me a well lil better naidu too :) I know what it is to be wid "collegues", it was all so different pehle. It so very different now :)
I aint a kid anymore, i aint a fresher anymore, i aint just out of college anymore, but i cant promise that there aint gona be a day i'll tell mumma.. i dont wana go like i used to for col or scool :) I gotto know all the work politics, all the gossips dat go around. i gotto know that one must not let out if they are goin onsite even if its project related .. to your OWN TEAM MATES, untill the d day when u meet them to say gud bye!! u neednt even say if ur leaving the organization et al. I learnt that it its ok to say no at times, i learnt its very necessary to say NO at times. I think m a lil more patient now. I learnt not to be super duper scared of deadlines to the extent dat u mess things up at home.

I met sm really gud ppl here, i now have a very nice gang that we cal the "namaz ki toli" :) I have Safaa still with me ( yea inspite my chutter butter n her silent nature, we;ve got along n shez talkin too :) ) have n nice team, have bhagya n gayatri to share work nuisances :) n a very gud pal who'd always be there. n keets n manso n shubh n anils n all of ;em.
hey its been gud ! :)
although i did remmber yesterday dat today is n important day, i realise its well speciall too, inspite the odds, the bads, the sads, this years has been.. well...... bright :) n i still dont believe it.. ic an write Experiance : 1 year (atleast!! ) in my resume now :D

n how can i forget to mention!! i;ve been a better blogger after cmin here :)

Adios!!

2007-09-03T12:31:00.000+05:30

Together and Apart

It did not matter anymore
How much ever things were bitter or sour

There was pain for one and another remorse
And in it were few hearts demerse

And talks that led to mere dissension
That later they would not want to mention

They weren’t to move to being silentious
But it does seem that they’d now be cautious

A thought or two before they speak
But many more in their mind if you peak

There somehow still is something that binds
Something that they know still it hides

If it’s like this then it may remain
But for longer still they will abstain.

A movin mind amidst movin clouds...

2007-08-31T08:48:00.000+05:30

I am in one of those not so often moods aj... m feeling the not so high spirit kinda thing... i js have this one damn thing stuck up for R10 n i dont know what m to do wid it. They committed for 3rd of sep, but hey they dint ask me before it,, umm wel ya they did mention it earlier though. I gues d prob was dat we thought we fixed it n dint send it onsite to test, n then got engrossed in fixing smthing dat was not a bug, n then whn i finaly released it, they say it aint fixed yet! , duh n soud had dn sm code changes fr it earlier n i dotn knw wat its bout n now i cnt wait til the 10th til hez back so i got to do smthin of it. but hell i dnt know d wierd way those parameters function. whats what is n important thing to know u see...

ahh neva mind.. i just hope hope hope and so much wish wish wish, that by day end its through, not matter how!

adios!

aiwai...

2007-08-29T11:24:00.000+05:30

i realised i neva began my post wid "As salam alaikum". how wierd is dat now!!!! huh more than what it seems like!!
but may b a lil less wierd than wat wipro has in mind for blogger... i dunno y its in such a confused state of mind :D, kabhi blogger ka home page is blockd so i cant post.. kabhi the blogspot pages blokd so i cant view, kabhi dono bloked! n aj dekho.. dono unblocked :D, n this is the best i like it :)

I am not sure how i can describe the ongoing phase of my life ( huh yea rrrite! gimme a break lady!!! :P:P) . Day before yesterday i prayed that the LI parameter thing be js fixed or smthin js happn to it, coz v;we been meddling wid it since a week now n ther was no fruitful result... n finally friday evening in a meeting we decide that we must come up wid n estimate coz we already have delayed R10 ( i dnt remmber v even had a date for it !! ) Anewyas, Naidu said Alex was in danger! n rough estimates wudnt do, we had to come up wid precise stuff, n cmon we cudnt commit when we were in the middle of... nowhere!!! I was supposed to prepare n analysis report n send it d next morning, based on which we were to cm wid n estimate, naidu noneless gave the date 3rd september, n we were hoping we'd fix it until then. And then the next morning was suddenly so beautiful and nice it showed me a mail that read .. the supposed "bug" is not a bug n dat we r trying to fix sometihng thats not required! finally.. wat a relief.. n i was jus gona build it n send release it... butttt.. again.. we remmber another damn problem!! n i was fidgetting wid it since yesterday :( n today morning to my suprise i fixed it pretty well unknowingly, when all i thought was dat iw as addressing the rong issue n dat my solution wud neva work.. but it all did :D. Soud was suppose to be on leave aaj se, but he turned up too, so iw as a lil more happy n thought we cud js release it n wash our hands off R10!! then i asked him to test it... but again.. as i did sm random testing.. the damn pdf files started having problems in download... wo bhi a javascript error! then i played wid it again thinking nah this aint gona help, but i'l js try n again surprisingly it did the trick.. n now i js build it... i hope soud tests it i cn give a final build.. i realy wana finish it aj.

Baba dint want me to go to wrk aj, he apparently felt i was sick n so shud take a leave, although i was dying to take one, i cudnt cz i knew soud is on leave so fr d next ten days i cnt even think of leave, coz i;d be responsible fr all d mail communications n anythin else of alex ! He said he;d talk to Naidu, n was very adamant, i managed to calm him down n rushed outta home..
n now dat i;ve finishd this, i hope i cn wrap it up early n may b leave early atleassttt.. hmm lets c noww...

I also feel m off blogging for quite smtime, there are so many things n ppl bout which/whom i havent logged anything.. well not sure bout everything but.. umm ya. there sure is smthing amiss.. but its ok i guess.. i;ll catch up may b.... perhaps the on n off that Wipro was playing wid blogger had n impact on my blogging interests n hence the variation in interest levels.

well okk dats all fr now.. n may b fr d day ( mark my 'may b' :D )

Massalaama !

My mind says : ? ? ?

2007-08-21T09:22:00.001+05:30

Back after a long time again... have had a busy weekend... a not so gud one but one that passed off well... n a very busy week start too... although i;ve got quite a few updates i feel a wierd sense of hesitation after reading a mail from n ex collegue.

A guy i worked with closely, dropped in a mail n all i could make out from it... was that he was in a pathetically chaotic state of mind. What makes me feel devastated is having known a person so closely n then getting to know something like this. I am scared. I realize i'm vulnerable to such things that my heart neva wants to believe that they even exist. A state of mind that is reluctant to accept that, no.. such things dont happen. They are for the movies n the "non realistic " world. But such things /people just seem to get me a step closer to.... well may b reality, but i still feel.. no this cant happen. It isnt all dat bad a world. I dont know whats with dat guy. I just hope hez alrite soon. I cant imagine to have known a person n worked with him (very closely) n then get to know he thinks of suicide? n dat hez being punished by the government n family and friends and everyone around, n even thinks he could be n object of "use" maybe by the R n D..... no way! aisa nai hota.. it cant be that way. it shudnt be that way.

neva mind.. i dont see myself in the rite frame of mind either. Somethingz rong, its so wierd. I think i am scared.

I dont know.. is it that i tend to live in a lovey dovey world that has only good things n so tend to ignore everything else around? thats not correct either, i cant turn blind to the adversities. but i dont know.. i cant believe of anything rong or bad happening to me or sm1 i love or care for or some1 ii;ve known just enuf....

khair... i got confirmed... Wipro wished me a successfull career "with them" lets c now..

i think dats bout it !

2007-08-16T09:52:00.000+05:30

With Her...

All she wanted was a little time of mine
I couldn’t think of how, that could be so divine

It wasn't that I couldn’t, but somehow I knew I wouldn’t
May be just a thought, perhaps I couldn’t take lament

I knew she liked it when I was around
But I still dint find out what left her spell bound

It was just talks that we would share
Not fantasies or dreams, no I wouldn’t dare

A meet or two was all we had
Then how could my absence make her so sad

And then we took a journey, of those kinds that's memorable
A journey perhaps which, I can not call impeccable

Again it was nothing, just gossip and some smiles
But yes, I wouldn’t deny I didn't mind the miles...

Tasneem wz here @ 11:21 PM it messed up the time too

2007-08-16T09:51:00.000+05:30

Adieu..

Time's just moving, days passed by
There was so much to say and so much to try
I didnt realize, i dint see it fly
All i know now .. its time to say gud bye

It is'nt that i'm complaining
I know you were too engrossed
There were other things that were important
Nothing that could be paused

Its just that there's a gap
I think there's something missing
There's so much more to all this
But i also know its nothing

The time i knew you i'll always cherish
The fact dat your presence was always a joy
I wish for you happiness that'll never perish
Thats what voices my heart dats a little coy.

dat site had emoticons like dat f hotmail .. 6 Aug

2007-08-16T09:49:00.000+05:30

MON
6AUG
Nokia6300, juviz weddin, n computers in "pinjraz" :D
Tasneem wz here @ 11:05 PM
Hey!! back after long again eh?!@!... i was sooo tied up i tell ya.. yesterday was like.. ahhh.. engorssseedd totally.. ni gues i got very tired by d end of d day.. mmm.. hey know watt? i bought a new mobile its a Nokia 6300 n i like it.. although i was diein for n E65, i stopped htinkin of it js a day before i actually was gona by d mobile.. coz i found out dat it dint hav FM radio... neways... i wasnt really for the 6300 coz i thought it looked boring.. but now dat i have it n m usin it.. i realise i failed to c the lustre it possessess ... so m like.. umm well yea.. njoyin it all d wayy

hmm work frotn.. like i said.. yesterday was.. woo weee waaa very busy.. i was goin in n outta d server room, hey.. i got access to d server pehli baar... i mean.. i likd d feel of seeing systems "band in pinjraz" lol.. dat means systems in cages ... geee. hehehe.. but man was it cold in there!! n i cudnt evn put my music on d other day u know! neways...

i really dont know where n how i gotto join these threads of my life to put it together n have 'em all in one place... ahhh.. hey wats wid d headfones.. they gimme a wierddd sound.. n annoying one ratheR! ahh..

i was at ammaz place yest.. went home pehle.. then wahan se amma ke pas.. n since iw as helllllllll tired!! i cudnt resist sleeping.. but thn dat dumbo Hamed, fell off his bike.. n came home all bleeding.. n i got up lisnin to his shouts.. n then it was 12.30 already.. n abhi kitneeeeeeee ki pooriyan baaqi the!! n i dint bel even one!! first time hua ye! but i cudnt help it... 8.30 se leke 11.30 tak wait kari mein... chaachiyon ku khaane khilaane se fursat ich nai thi!! so i waited n waited n waited untill i cudnt take it anymore.. n hey.. as i was waiting.. gues wat i was lisnin to.. not really sure.. magar old zamaane ke gaane.. nai gaane nai the.. u kno d mushaaira kind.. not very sure but i think i heard sm1 say it was sm munni begumz ghazals.. n itneeeee high class the ki meku ek bhi samjh me nai aay a:D hehe.. d only one i undstood was this.. n i happen to remmber it.. it goes like this....
Do hi pal kathin guzre zindagi ke
do hi pal kahtin guzre zindagi ke
ek tere aane se pehle
ek tere jaane ke badd... ( cute icon naiii)
n iwas sittin alone on d takhat in the aangan, under d tree n zabardast hawa chalri thi.. n i finally i heard this n undstood it n i burst out laughin n chachi was inside n she saw me laughin wo bhi alone.. n she wondered y, so i clarified before her brain cells cud think any further, dat i was tryin to undstand wat this lady hz been singin since so long.. n this is d first n d only one i undstood so far.. n so she laughed wid me too :) hehe..

khair.. chalra yaa.. life;s on.. n its movin.. m glad its movin , n m not so sad bout where its headign coz i ditn really set a direction fr it... n i know it osunds super lazy! or may b i;d say it sounds so much like Tasneem :D

n i think m gona move home early aj.. coz i goto go to ammaz place.. n fir shaam me juvi ke pas bhi jana haii.. heyyyyyy.. parson.. dats on suday.. yaani keeeeeee 5th August was Juvi ki shaadi.. n it was really gud to see her as a bride

mmmm chalo ya.. wil move out frm here.. or may b i'll put in those lil notepad scribbles i had done whn i missed blogger n dint hit sampa yet..

Adios!!!

!st Aug

2007-08-16T09:43:00.000+05:30

July 31, 2007
TUE
31JUL
(: Wipro'z shown me quite a few Rainbows :)
Tasneem wz here @ 8:54 AM
I've got quite a few reasons to be happy :). Yesterday was the first ever time that i did not feel sad/ angry/ frustrated while leaving office late. Infact it all seemed so beautiful ny nice at dat time.. i felt this wierd sense of satisfaction, a very peaceful heart and a content Tasneem returning home late from work.

That NRJ problem i was talkin of yesterday was solved finally. n surprisingly i had a major contribution to it. Kannan was really happy.. it seemd like dat from his mails. I did put in effort even during the Omnidaemon problem time.. but ya i saw Soud ( dats short for Soumendra, most of 'em call him dat here) work really hard on dat, so i dint really want to take all d credit, but was glad i put in just enuf and was always there when he needed me. n this time for the NRJ thing.. i actually dint no it was all dat major a problem.. its just dat after v( me n soud) solved it v realisd dat the oniste guyz r more than happy n they went like "Great Great Great guys. Great job done!!" n i could read all the excitement in that. It was n 8 month old problem it seems n now Ericsson benefits a lot from what we've done to solve it.. well knowing all that.. it jus gave me a high.. n i thought.. well ok.. i cn do really gud things at times too . n the most surprising hting was when in the meeting with Kannan, Naidu mentioned, that he would nominate me n him for the FIMC ( thats some wipro internal award, not really sure of what exactly but it stands for Feather In My Cap) so that made me feel gud n surprised rather, n dats whn i felt.. yo.. i really did smthin nice :)

It rained or quite smtime yesterday... n there was this beautifulll almost full rainbow... have a luk at d besto ne so far..

mmm Safa's call .. wil get bak here after cofee.. shez waitin fr me..

bbbbbbbbaccckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk !!
lol ok.. u see d excitment here too haan.. lol..

aneways.. so d point was dat i was more than surprrised when NAidu mentioned dat, coz i always thought n well.. still do.. that i aint in his gud books, n i never wanted to do anything extra to get into his gud buks, no maskafying et al... so i'd do my work n just dat... n i told ya even earlier there was a lil tiff wid him wn he wanted me to get back to wrk aftr 6 wn iw as actually moving homewards, n i had refused.. n also i thought in dat meeting wid Bala whn i mentioned bout d appreciation bit, he must have taken it personally.. but wid all this also.. he like .. umm ok.. behaved like a manager should.. so m glad n well m also feelin js a lil bad bout... sayin all d bads bout it.. but hey they were in context wid a situation yaa.. n i dont regret sayin it.. but.. umm ok janedooo..

khair.. ya so yesterday i could see the rainbow on my way back from Asar, n whn i got bak i had this quick meetign wid Kannan, so i head strait to naiduz cube n there we had a talk to stabilize things, n we zeroed in on releasing Alex R9/3 ( i dint realise we wer wrkin on a whole new release.. hehe.. release ka pressur hi aur hota hai.. ) aneywas... so dat call was at about 5.45 so i was sure i'd have to leave only after i made the build.. coz soud aint all dat gud at building d windows n solaris versions.. so.. i made the r9/2 final build n then we delivered both R9/3 n R9/2.. so it was 7 already n i cudnt miss d bus ofcours.e. but as i walked dat path alone (as usual) it was d first time i felt really really nice at dat time n i liked being at dat place ( meaning still at office) at that moment . Three words to sum up my feelin.. satisfied, at peace n happy... now is'nt dat d perfect combination to have a pefectly delightful day

but yea.. i had to cancel my plan of meeting juvi again.. but m gona do it today come wat may!!.. if i miss it aj.. then therz no other dya i cn make.. so i got to do it aj.. may b i'll plan smthin by 4 or so n check her availabilty.. but if she aint there.. may b i'll meet her after 6.. but i sure will meet her aj!!!

n may b i'll have a peaceful day aj bhi.. peaceful in the true sense.. hopefully just relaxing with very very little or no work at all.. so its music all the wayyyyy...n may b i'll drop in here again in some later part of d day.. untill thenn...
Tasneemz Signing Off !!!

31st July.. not sure y but dat site always messd up d dates

2007-08-16T09:42:00.001+05:30

MON
30JUL
jus another day..
Tasneem wz here @ 10:40 PM

I dont get it yaa.. ....... m fidgetting wid this new environment.. playin wid it.. messing wid it.. i js hope it dznt get annoying soon n i dont loose my cool !!
how come therz no edit entry in d menu where i wana change d header of my blog? i dunno y my namez there! therz jus n add entry and i cud add my regular title.. duh.. anewyas.. may b i'll play wid it a lil more untill i get a response from them bout d latest binary...

yea i;ve been putting logs so we can figure out where exactly the problem is... kya yaa.. it works fine here.. then its ok in finland too... the germans had a problem say.. umm last summer, but thn it was ok again.. n now the japanese are yelling about it... it seemz they;v siezed the payments for Ericsson n so now the pressure is all on us so v gotto do smthin so that they get their pay cheques on time n so dat v dont miss out on ours... m not alllll dat much bout what wipro gets.. cz anyways i knw they;r gettin a lot ( aadha to hamare cuttings me se ich !! damn! ) so.. as long as it dznt effect mine.. nah i still would;t sya i dont care.. coz umm well.. d works mine n wats d point if sm1 aint able to use it at d end of d day... blaa.. ok..lots of bragging done bout wrk..

so what next.. i dont even remmber where i;d left bloggin n where i;ve got to continue wid... ahh.. but all in all.. it smhow is such a nice feelin.. or may b i'd say a relieving feeling to let go :D,( luk at d way i say let go!! ) hehe..

aneways... hmm i like d luk of this place though... but yea i really need to explore into it all to get to c what all it offers...

hey.. my appraisal is still pending wid naidu... m wondering..a fter those cofee gossip talks v had... whats he gona rate me... pehleich apne pange hai wo bande se.... magar kya hai ki bhai.. workwise.. he has nuthin against me to say.. so lets c.. but d kinda fela he is.. i wudnt b surprised if he gives me n NI, but yea i sure m gona mess it all up n make him show what he means by dat n ya dat time i;ll ensure i have all my wsr's wid me... n thn may b he;ll relaise.. oh ya.. if she really needs to improve .. i wonder how she did soooo much ( wel fr a fresher it is soooo much! ) to make d release succesful ( well ok ...... but it did go rite! n my requrement wasnt d problem!! )

hmm i;ve got few other things i had put on notepads.. may be i'll put 'em here smtime laterzz...
for now.. i think i'll... umm well.. ok may b put sm music on :) n continue playing wid this.. i really need to figure out what to do with this header thing... n hey!! u know i;ve got this really important+funny+silly+ ummm i dunno.. kinda thing to let out.. but m not sure n dont think i want to ... but wooooooooooo was i shocked to know it was him !!!

adios fr now!!

Voila! Wipro did it for me again !!

2007-08-16T09:13:00.000+05:30

Wowww!! lolll... ye lo mithaai bhi aagai... hehehe.. ya a team mate bak frm home town.. but fr me.. its khushi to be back in d same envii.. yuhuu!! m luvin itt.. papparappappaaa! m luvin ittt.. heheh dats how d Mc Donaldz thign goes nai? :D geee

iw as jus about post frm my mailbox.. n there i saw Anil drop in al ine.. givin me d newss.. hehehe.. i dunno wats wid Wipro n y it goes on n off like htis wid blogger! n ya i had to pass on this info to sm of team mates.. cz well.. yea noww.. they r into blogging too.. n .. well. :D :D yea.. i kinda think i am a reason :D:D:D:D

okk.. this is smthin like puran puri.. :D acchich hai.. magar thodi oily hai.. zyada hi.. khair..

its so gud to b back after a lil break ... i mean.. bak to work... oh yes.. dats me sayin its good to back to WORK! :D this is one nice way i gues.. mon tue work.. wed hol.. thur fri work.. n again sat sun hol.. woooowww.. kitna accha hota nai? but it aint dat way... " aapke saath aisa na hoga no no no noo :D "

hhehe.. too many ad jingles on my mind eh? .. nah not too much tv.. but ya i noticed my fam.. especailly my sisters growing interest in .. well ya those soaps.. i unbelievably... all d channels are back wid a bang.. n m wondring what kinda stuf this time n holding their audiances on...

it was just yesterday i read this article in the newspaepr ( haaaaaaaaan ! i read d newspaper after n age i tell ya ! ) n well.. know wat it was about... :D well the agenda was smthing like... ummmm.. welll... may b i'll sum it up in a line " Save English from the English" lol.. gud one nai.. :D i cant really recollect the title or the author but ya it was a gud one after long... not dat i keeo chkin dat column often.. its just dat my eyes fell upon it fr a while n man it sure was interesting.... i wodner what dat guy wud say if he;d read my blogs.. may be he;d wish to reach his grave soon n even after dat may b he;d want it to b the end of dat lol... well ok.. it one or two phrases i remmber readin went like this....... not really quoting ha... js reframing ;em all.. He seemed to be annoyed by the fact the journalists, columnists and the broadcasters too went way beyond messing up english during times when they were largely communicating wid huge well presicely a global audiance.... n surprisingly all of these or may b most of them were English, n one example dat guy kpt repeating was.. during the cricket world cup.. when he said that d reporters reported about "England's defeat to Australia" n he seemd to be goin crazy wid d fact that "defeat to" wasnt appropriate... may be it shud hv been England lost to Australia or may Australia defeated England.. well ... aisich kuch to b tha yaro.. janedo ab.. khair it was agud article i tell ya.. i think it was in dat coulmn.. spectator at chronicle.. umm smthin like dat. not really sure again...

ahh.. i read this releaving mail aate hi.. frm Kannan.. the NRJ finally il b taken into production! man dat was one nice things to feel... n u know i kinda missed out on riting about one evengin.. dat beautiful one .. whn i was leaving late frm work.. i mean at 7 ! n i first time i ditn really feel v bad cz i felt this gudy gudy satisfaction inside.. newyas.. not really sure if i logged dat on the other site but hey m gona move in all dat here too.. n mannnnnn m i happy bout being here !! :) :)

but the sf n pr thing is stil in a fix... n m well.. pretty much into it !! lets c now... n dat appraisal of mien is still pending.. n i dint mention.. Naidu came to my desk the other day ( he cmz to my place soooooooooooooooooooo often these days! ) n was askin me if i;d contribute to d Knet.. n i..w ell d gudy that i am.. obviously replied in the affirmative but also sited that since i;m tied up may b it'll take me some time.. n he then had this suggestion list opened to help me see where i cn squeeze in time for it.. n ya he told me may b half n hour or so at wrk.. n smtime after goin home ( YEA RRRRRRRRRRRRITE!! ) neways.. i set dat aside fr now.. the parameter issue is stil on.. n i really wonder if CPI for Solutions is eva gona see the lite of day....

hmmmmmmm.. chalo abhi ke liye kafi hai.. wil move in other things here.. not sure if i want to.. but.. well ya.. since its a collectin fr a lifetime.. i dont wana miss out on any page of my buk f life! :)

adiosss!!

This onez from tasneem.begum@wipro.com

2007-08-14T12:57:00.000+05:30

Finally m bloggin from here… although th feel aint the same.. but nah.. its fine I cn manage…

Man m having this helluva time wid Alex rite now… I dunno wats rong.. n wats wid the sf parameter only when the libraries are loaded… I fixed itt o the extent dat the tree loads… but now.. the libstate aint shown at all… n whn I did try to display d libstate.. it gave me d same damn error while loading with just dat paramater! Its kinda getting irritating abhi to.. but I still have it on mind.. my work.. got to do it.. my work.. go to do it..yea dat kinda thing..

I was just wondering how it is to be obsessed with work… is obsession something one does out of love or like or something of dat sort.. towards something? Or cn it be .. umm well just n obsession…. Dnt be surprised.. its js dat I was bein a lil calculative n wondering if I were unser such a pathetic syndrome… huh.. work obsession??? Nooooo wayyzzz… but I dunno wat it is.. it sure is smthin.. I feel tied up all d time.. umm ok may b not I feel.. its dat I AM tied up all d time.. n hardly have time.. umm well.. for anything else at all… i;ve stopped complaining too… cz although I see myself striving.. I also realize that sooner or later ( usually later!! ) I get to see d results.. n hence have turned out to be a lil more patient than my usual self…. Now I aint speculating on the adverse sides of it… cz I know the more I explore into it… m gona find lots.. n lots .. n lots.. n may b d first … hey I had a call frm a very gud frnd who wz very excited bout this interview he had wid a Japan client.. he sounded satisfied n happy J n.. wats more required outta dat J

Ya so now where was i…. ahh neva mind… I;ve got these other few things in mind.. but hvnt had d time to think ova.. n u knw wat!!! Ash ka Nikah hai kal !!!! yea cn I belive dat? Hehe.. I dunno.. many things happning.. n man life;s changing… Safa was telling me js this morning.. dat whn she left for home early yesterday, she got to set up the dinner table n she felt nice arranging siz plates( d count of her fam) n then it struck to her that she wudnt be duin dat after three four days… n dat reminded me.. how I underwent a similar situation a few years back…. Its so different n life;s moving at such pace.. n I hardly find anytime to “live” it… its all passing by so fast.. things cmin.. n things goin.. dats all dats happnin.. but its gud too.. but there sure is smthin ticking in there dat tells me…. Since its all passing by.. is dat n end is approaching? I dunno what exactly I mean by dat.. but yea.. smthingz there dats gona finish, its just dat time doesn’t stay as long as it used to earlier… now dat again is such a weird line.. J well cmin frm me.. u’ll find everything “weird”

Movin fr namaz… damn sure I wont find time scribble fr.. umm I dunno :D

Ciao !

!!##@@&&back wid a bang&&@@##!!

2007-08-11T18:12:00.000+05:30

yuhooo.. it worked it worked it workedddddddddddddddddddddddd.. :)
so herez me.. back wd a bang.. n man m i relieved !!

wil move in other things i scribled smwhere else , n my notepad scribbles lyin on my ofic desktop too... wil fill it up all here.. on monday!! o ooo.. no.. may b not monday.. ive got hellll lota work already set fr mnday.. :( .. hmmm may b i'll squeeze in sm time inspote d hectic schedule :D, coz if u cnt hv time fr wt u luv, thn wats all ur time fr at alll? ggee.. gud thought nai hehhe..

hey.... chicken biryani fr dinner?... ahan.. Tasneem made!!! n now u know its gona b a DeLiGhT to cherish :D

adiozz! ( i missd this place soo muchh :D :D)

publishing via email

2007-08-11T18:02:00.001+05:30

I aint really sure if this is gona work like m expecting it to, but i still wana try.. coz if this really works.. thn i cn get bak on blogger... not dat i hv a a readership, but i;m so much in luv with my space that i miss it comfort n cnt find it anywhere else ( yea i did try another blog site dat aint blocked at office... ) umm well lets c it now...

fingerz crossed!! i hope this works!!

Commitment and more..

2007-07-16T10:52:00.000+05:30

mmmmmmmmm... i opened this page to start off wid a "Good Morning" but it dint seem dat wya.... its 3.51 p.m.. so herez a Good Afternoon :) n i guess its good in every sense :)

first things frist... as i started off d day.. i had this thing in mind to put overhear which i had pondered over the weekend coz of sm situations/ circumstances dat i came across n sm lil things even zapped me... anyways.. "commitment" was d supposed agenda.. but like i just mentioned.. d aftnun is really gud.. n dats coz naidu aint here n so d the cpi gal gang planned a movie.. a supposed thriller!.. i;d rather call it a comic thriller... now dont luk at those two words separately or loosely.. imagin .. in the true sense of the word.. how would a comic thriller be? well.. it;d be like Naqaab. Although i liked Akhshaye khanna and d new girl was prety n nuthin more.. n bobby is so used to playing the "rich" guy!
ok .. nothin on a review now....
will get back on that serious note... now? na... mayb another dya.... coz dat mood aint alive... magr...... mmmm... its not gona b a no naidu day again!.. but hell ! how dz his presence have to matter ?

aneways.. lemme put it since i thought it would n i actuallyw as gonna...
A friend i know of... had a steady life.. was seeign a guy since quite smtime... n i actually thought they;d end up together forevr.... i was shocked wn i got to knw she had a proposal on hand n was desperate.. she reportedly said the family is very decent and they are very simple people.... i was a shocked, although ya i was a lil happy coz things seemd to be materializing.. but like i said i was more curious bout wat made her change her mind... i really thought she was committed. then? well ok family problems may b.. but still as of i know bout d person.. she;d b d kind to convince if she wills... moreover she had gud ties wid guyz family.. it cdnt b that things went rong anywhere...
well i mean.. when u think n know and feel that fine.. this is it.. then.. movin on wid life wid smthing else? possible? i dont know.. d thought kinda gives me a devastating shiver...

i know of ppl woh wudnt let go their loved one for anything too.. but not dat i am questioning the character or mind or heart of the other person..they sure know what theya re duin.... but it just makes me wonder.. how cn human mind of heart for dat matter fickle at such a rate especially about such important decissions about life....

i know of secret admirers too... ppl m talkin of here are d onez i closely know... whats surprising is.. irrespective of age... theirz such a variety in preferences when it comes such things... therre really isnt a way one can guess or predict what one might want... may b dats one those many things that uniquely identifies a human being...

aneways, i do belive what happens happens for gud.. coz the Planner is Supreme.

well.. all dat said... dats just one side of "commitment", i also know of ppl who dont find commitment an integral part of friendship.. i beg to differ there though.... commitment aint just bout promising to spend life together,,, wud b nice to c it in anything u do... in anything u share wid yourself or wid another one whoz close.. family/ friend !
i was taken aback when i heard of( from a trustful source) a frnd sayin that he had'nt committed to her, when all she had asked was you lied bout ur very own name? n there was nothing more between them than friendship. n so he dint find it important to tell his correct name?!!

anyways... may b more on dat someother time... i really need more variant insights on that to know of the different mentalities or thought processes the human mind exhibits.. or may b varying bundle of emotions d human heart swears to contain !!

I know m not suppose to feel like this

2007-07-11T18:56:00.000+05:30

but.. :D
m feeling much better now...
coz.. :D
coz.....
cozzzzzzzzzz
i got to kno..
thattt
that
that
hehe.. my pm got just 1% salalry hike! :D serves him rrrrrrrrittttte!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D

:( :~ :`(

2007-07-11T18:37:00.000+05:30

aakhri phiriwi hai meri abhi !!
i am no mood to rite! not 1 damn bit!
n m hating every damn thing
muummyyy hona meku abhiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii

isi shauq ka imtihaan zindagi hai...

2007-07-10T17:45:00.000+05:30

i put my headfones on n the volume was full.... i wanted to lisn to Jaaveda Zindagi from Anwar... (awesome song yaaaa...) n so i did.... n my pals sittin about 4 cubicles away from mine coudl hear it :D, ab soncho??? heehhehe... ooparse Naidu's place is just beside mine.. m sure he heard d entire song ;)... lucky himm... meri wajah he got to hear a gudie (unless he wan on d fone yelling at sm1 !! )
nways.... d silly thing was... Soumendra was tryin to say smthin to me.. n since i cudnt hear him.. he hit d table wid the pen heheh :D ya.. he had to do that to grab my attention... dumb na? hehe.. very stupid...

newyas... m sure m quite popular wid my team bout not being able to hear wn i have my headfones on .. n these ppl are quite used to standing behind me for smtime whn i dont respond to their calls, n then i see htier reflection in this glass board here n realise sm1z there :D...... good or bad? i dotn know.... actually... i dotn really care... dats one thing i do here that i like... not gona let go it come what may ;)
therz jus one hting.. they never know whn my i put my headfones one ;) coz they never get to c 'em :D
waise bhi... my quality of work tends to improve with music in d backgrpund :), i do better coding n better analysis... :D

khair... its past 6... gotto push off....

Ciaoo ~!~